Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Question of the Day: Picking Birth Months

So I've made it clear on more than one occasion that I have not had much control over the timing of my children. They have come to me when they (and God) planned, not when I did. HOWEVER, a lot of people seem to be able to have a baby whichever old month they choose.

So, if you could pick what months your children were born in, what would you choose? Why?

I have several criteria, some logical, some silly:

1--I like February, May, September, and October because they have pretty birthstones and I have a mother's ring so I'm allowed to care about stuff like birthstones

(amethyst, emerald, sapphire, and opal respectively, if you didn't know) you have to admit they are pretty stones! (but of course my kids were born in June and January and this one is due in November. Oh well!)

2--I think it's nicer as a kid to have a birthday that is around a half-year away from Christmas. It makes it easier to get through the year when the two present-getting days are spread out rather than right next to each other. I have a July birthday and always found it satisfactory. Hubby said his January birthday was rather lame in that regard.

3--I think spring/summer babies are nice because then by the time winter and cold/flu season rolls around they are older and have a stronger immune system.

4--Once you have a kid or two, I think it's nice to spread out the birthdays...have everybody in different months. One of my sisters-in-law has 3 kids with birthdays in May. She planned that because she feels that May is the perfect month to have a baby. Well, be that as it may (no pun intended), it means that she's got three birthdays in a two week period every year. There's potential for financial strain for presents, stress over multiple parties, and the risk that the poor kids will end up having their celebrations combined. It's almost as bad as having your birthday on Christmas Day. So let's hear it for spreading out the birthdays! (It also keeps the mother's ring more interesting!)

5--A baby at the end of the year is nice for financial purposes (dare I confess that I'm thrilled that this one is coming within the year? Because for us it's not just the tax deduction, it's also the PFD--that oil dividend that Alaskan residents get. It's a lot of money!)


Emily said...

I didn't choose my kids' birthdays, and yet somehow ended up two December birthdays - 21st and 28th - both right next to Christmas, no less. But we go out of our way each year to make their birthday separate and special, and their birthday presents are different from their Christmas presents. For the school-aged one, I even have a second birthday party in January to which she can invite her school friends, as they are on vacation during her actual birthday.

My UC baby, on the other hand, was born in July. She was due in June, and we had names picked out and everything. But 2 weeks past my due date, and well into July, we decided to change her name to Ruby - after a close friend, and the birth stone of the month which she was now destined to be born in.

Becky N. said...

Any birth month that doesn't mean I'm hugely pregnant the entire summer is a-OK with me!! Unfortunately I've experienced summer pregnancies for 2/3 of my kids - and I hope to never experience it again.

I really loved my spring baby - it's so nice to not have to bundle them up all the time! The only annoyance was finding a winter coat to accommodate my belly. Otherwise the timing seemed perfect!

I have a June birthday, and I love that it's halfway between Christmas. I wouldn't want a birthday that meant every single birthday party would need to be indoors due to weather. My daughter's October birthday is just on the border of good weather- I hate planning her parties, because I can never determine what the weather will be like. But for a June party, it's a pretty easy guess. ;)

Mallory said...

I want to have a baby in August, because that means my last trimester would be during the heat of summer. Most women think that would be horrible, but I think it would be great, because I could go float in the pool to help relieve the pressure and pain of pregnancy!

TopHat said...

I agree with the not too close to Christmas aspect. My b-day is 13 days before Christmas. I would get something like a sled for my birthday and then when Christmas came, my siblings would all get sleds. It was like there was nothing special for me. Plus, my brother and sister (birthdays in July) got things like bikes or rollerblades. Because my birthday was in the winter, I just got winter things. It kind of sucked.

And now, my DH's birthday is two weeks after Christmas. We've got our fill of winter birthdays. :)

Petit Mouton on Etsy said...

I do not plan birth months, with two exceptions: I would avoid an EDD around Christmas. DH is a Christmas baby and he has always hated it. I want to spare that to my kids.
The other thing we avoided when planning our first was to have her in the spring. At the time DH had to travel for fish season a lot and it would not have been a good thing to go in labour while he was in a remote plant on the Alaskan coast. Now this doesn’t matter anymore though, he changed job.

My mom did plan birth months for very practical reasons. She was a teacher. With my first brother she had a February baby, had 4-6 weeks of mat leave after the birth and had to go back to work. It broke her heart.
It is no coincidence if my other brother and I are born in June... this way she could combine her maternity leave with summer vacation. :-)
My aunt (also a teacher) did the same thing. Her kids are all born in September or June.

Miche said...

We didn't plan a specific month for our fist, but did do our best to have him in the summer-he came in September. our next we did try to plan for summer again (for the reason they would be older and stronger by cold season) and he agreed to come in June. Our next I'd like to try for March, April or May. That way b-days are separated, AND I can avoid being prego in the hot summer. We will see :) I also love the birthstones so far, and March would be pretty to add to a mother ring

Miche said...

And CONGRATS!! on the new baby :) Yay!

sara said...

None of our kids were planned by the calendar either. I would love a late spring baby - just not May! We have way too many May bdays on both sides of our family. Dec is like that too but we did have one a week before Christmas. We try to make it a fun birthday for him though. I also have a November, September, July, and this one will also be Sep. I LOVE the July bday. We can have such fun parties in the summer! Sep can be nice or not here in Utah. November - not - but my bday is also Nov and growing up in Cali I was still able to have nice bdays outside. We don't plan on always being in Utah so that doesn't matter to me too much ;)

Becky said...

An interesting question to ponder...

I think more about when the first four months of my pregnancy would be, since I get pretty sick. With the second and third pregnancies, I planned to get pregnant in April so that Adam was out of school for the worst part of it. I guess that means I like January babies?? I was a December baby, which makes my birthday not as fun since it's so close to Christmas.

Brooke said...

I always wanted an April baby, but it didn't work out for me. In my family we have the following birthdays
Jan - Mom and brother
Feb - sister
March - me
April -
May - nephew
June - hubby and son (he was supposed to be April, but it took a couple of months to get pg)
July - daughter #2 (I miscarried a baby that would have been due May 1st, then got pg again due in mid-July)
August - brother-in-law
October - dad & daughter #1
Nov -
Dec - niece

We have nicely spaced out birthdays for the most part, June and Oct being the exceptions... April would have been a nice addition!!

Lisa said...

The idea of planning birth months is very foreign to me since my children are adopted, but the only criteria I would have is that nobody else be born in July. Both of my kids and my dh have July birthdays, plus we have Independence Day, Pioneer Day (here in Utah, which is also ds's birthday), and family reunions. With my children being adopted, birthdays mean preparing long letters and big packages for their birth families, and that gets pretty overwhelming. I don't think I could add more of that in the same month!

I did like that they were old enough to be safer during the Winter cold season, though.

Beyond that, I really don't care--I'm just thrilled to get to have a baby at all!

Janeen said...

I was actually very happy to have a December baby and that she was due around Christmas. Why? Because, due to my husband's religious beliefs, we do not celebrate Christmas and that was hard for me to deal with for a long time. I actually wanted to get married December 27th but that didn't work out and the wedding ended up being on my birthday in October. My daughter was due Christmas Eve and came out December 27th, two years after my original wedding date.

Destiny said...

All ours have winter birthdays: November, December and February. We only planned the December one that way. The only months I try to avoid are late August, September and early October because it affects when they would start school. We tend to have smart children and it would kill me to have to keep them home another year when I know they would be ready because they missed the deadline by mere weeks.

katef said...

Oh great baby questions you're asking at the moment.. love 'em!

I'd really like a late summer baby - so for us that is one born Feb/March. I love the warm weather HATE the cold. Love summer clothes and the lifestyle and just generally enjoy summer... I am not even worried about being hugely pregnant in the hot weather!

I got the conception almost right for the girls - they were due at the end of Jan.. pity they came three months early in Nov!

I got the conception bang on perfect for our next baby, but that one didn't stay around... and well Muski snuck in right after that so he is a mid year baby... a half Christmas baby in fact on June 25th. And let me tell you.. it is COLD here on June 25th. Getting up in the night to pee at the end of pregnancy was horrible.. only rivalled by having to get my boobs out in the icey air to feed all night long!

Despite the fact that I should know better by now, and accept that you just can't plan children, the planning nut in me is still hoping to hit the jackpot... I'm determined.. even if that means baby number four before number three has a bedroom!

Kelly said...

Yeah, December and January are terrible months for a birthday. [One of mine was born in January and I feel bad for her. :( ].

Any other month is good really, maybe February - October. [Nov again too close to Christmas].

I also think it is nice to spread them out, but like you, I haven't had too much control. I have two born in April and two born in August - it does cause a budget strain in those months! Plus it would be neat for them each to get their "own" month! [With 6 kids though, it gets harder to do that LOL!].

Neat question!

Kelly said...

Oh, also, I agree that May would be the perfect month to have a baby for *selfish* reasons - you are pregnant in the heat of the summer AND you don't have to worry about cold and flu season till they are a little older! Of course, none of my kids were born in May. LOL!

Christa said...

well my twins were born on May 5...but they were due June 28th. The baby that I lost was also due on June 28th.
My birthday is in May, so we have enough May birthdays, but I don't really care alll that much I guess, I just don't want to share my birthday.

I don't want Christmas babies either, poor kids. I had friends whose parents would just combine their gift and get them one big thing...that would break my heart!

~Sandy~ said...

i totally agree with the Mommy birthstone ring...my son was born in Dec and my daughter in Sept. both have blue birthstones. my birthday is march so i also have a blue birthstone!!! guess i am going to have to settle with a blue mommy ring :O) love your blog

Kimberlee said...

I'd take a baby any time I could get one.
That said
my least favorite month to have a baby was January. It is smack in the middle of RSV season and sweet baby spent 2 weeks at our local children's hospital with RSV.
I would love a summer or fall baby. But seem to only have winter babies.

Mother Goose said...

i have one in april- diamond, he should have been born in June

I have another in August- she is a peridot

I have another born in Feb- amethyst she should have been born in March

and my last is August a peridot as well and HE should have been born 3 months after and been a citrine!
dangit those kids beat me out of a beautiful mothers ring that would have been multi colored!

Sanity said...

Being born in June, I happen to think that my TRUE birthstone (Alexandrite) is actually very pretty in it's natural form.

And at this point, I would settle for getting pregnant at all, and I really don't care when it's due.

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