A "Crunchy" Mama

(I started this post a looong time ago, then I got morning sick, then I didn't get around to finishing it...but I still wanted to post it so here goes!)


So, I labeled myself as a crunchy mama, then Jenn over at BabyMakinMachine asked me what it meant, so I tried to explain, and it led to her writing this post in which she pondered crunchiness and whether it was for her. That post then led to nearly 50 comments (most of them lengthy and some of them quite heated)... and I concluded that I was gonna just lay it all out.
I think Jenn put it quite fairly when she suggested that perhaps there's a middle level, somewhere between 'crunchy' and 'soggy' (or mainstream) which might be called 'chewy.' I find myself chewy in a number of things, because I'm not nearly so far off the beaten path as many of my uber-crunchy friends. On the other hand, I'm pretty far off the beaten path!

My reasons for being crunchy (or chewy) come from one main thing, and that is that I believe in questioning the status quo, and doing my own research about things, so that I can make my own decisions about what is best for me and my family. Again and again I discover that mainstream practices were born of the greedy side of capitalism (not that capitalism is evil in and of itself, but the associated greediness certainly is...) and that the things that really seem best are falling into this category called "crunchy." Here are my few basic tenets:

1. I believe in not messing with the way God made things.
2. I believe that Godmade is better than manmade, and should be utilized if available.
3. I believe in avoiding unnecessary interventions/chemicals
4. I believe in respecting people and the Earth.
5. I believe in logic
6. I believe in making things cheap, easy, and comfortable unless there's a good reason not to (you got it folks, I'm lazy!).

So what does this mean?

I believe in not messing with the way God made things

• My body gives me signs every month of what is going on with my fertility, so I observe them and take notes rather than trying to control or change them.
• My body makes milk for my baby, therefore, I should give it to the baby.
• God made baby boys with foreskins. End of discussion.
• If you're gonna drink cow milk (which is actually made for baby cows you know), then at least drink it whole, or even raw. Its vitamins are fat-soluable, so if you want the nutritive benefits of it, you'd better be getting the fat with it. Oh, and the low/no-fat versions have petroleum in them, just FYI.
• God made some people women, and some people men, and then He gave them each bodies built to fulfill certain roles, therefore I birth and nurture children and keep our home, while my husband provides for and protects our family.

I believe that Godmade is better than manmade

• So infant formula is only for emergencies, not for the average baby.
• Food out of the dirt or off a tree = good, food out of a box = not so good.
• If there's an herb that fits the bill, then I don't want some chemically formulated pill. Ideally I'd like nothing at all.
• I think HFCS (high fructose corn syrup) is bad news...I'm trying to restrict it in our diet, though I doubt we'll manage to remove it entirely.
• Partially hydrogenated anything = evil
• I believe in butter. Margarine is the devil (also it tastes like BLECH).
• I've recently found that I vastly prefer natural fibers (cotton, wool, hemp, bamboo) over almost all of the synthetics. Especially now that Eagle seems to break out when he wears synthetics.
• I don't typically wear makeup--I wear the face God gave me.

I believe in avoiding unnecessary interventions and chemicals

• The vast majority of women's bodies can give birth without intervention, so they should be allowed to do so.
• If my child is exploring, I don't get in the way unless injury is imminent.
• If (older) kids disagree, I try to help them work it out, rather than stepping in and taking over.
• I think that antibiotics are making superbugs, so I don't use antibacterial soaps or products in my home, and would not seek (or take) a prescription for an antibiotic unless there were a good reason for it (such as post-surgery).
• I don't wear makeup (most of it is toxic to some degree)
• I don't use scented soaps/lotions/shampoos/detergents.

I believe in respecting people...

• I try to boycott companies that treat their employees badly (such as Walmart)
• My children do not call adults by their first names. If an adult is more than a few years older than myself *I* usually do not call them by their first name.
• I think it's offensive to do cosmetic surgery on an infant boy's private parts without his permission.
• I follow my infant's schedule, rather than demanding that he follow mine.
• I don't let a small infant cry. I don't let an older child cry for long.
• I try to be gentle and respectful in my parenting.
• I try to take care of myself by eating (relatively) well and dressing modestly
• If I can tell that my infant needs to poop, I often remove his diaper and hold him over the toilet. There's no reason to force him to sit in his own waste for even a moment if I can help it.

...and respecting the earth

• I try to support local farmers, and sustainable farming practices
• I recycle
• I buy second-hand if I can
• I re-use or re-purpose things because I don't throwing away good fabric/wood/etc
• I try to be minimalist
• I try to stock my kitchen (and my kids' toyboxes) with things that will last--things made from wood, metal, or glass.
• I use recycled packaging when I mail things
• I use cloth diapers, wipes, rags, etc. (I do use cloth pads, but this was a very secondary reason for it--the primary reason is below)

I believe in logic

• I make milk + baby is hungry = give the kid a boob!
• I need sleep + baby needs sleep + baby needs to eat during the night = let's all sleep in the same place
• Babies like to be held + mommy needs to get stuff done = babywearing
• Children learn by example, therefore I should be gentle with them if I want them to learn to be gentle with me or anyone else.
• I see the sense in some vaccines (though not all) but I also see the dangers...so the ones we get we get on a spread-out schedule.

I'm lazy, frugal, and like my comforts

• I use cloth pads and cloth diapers because fabric is more comfortable than plastic on tender parts.
• babywearing is cheaper and easier than strollers and carriers (and doesn't require smooth sidewalks, of which we have precious few here!)
• I re-use or re-purpose things because I don't want to spend the money to buy new ones.
• I don't wear makeup--I've got the face I've got and if you don't like it then don't look, I'm not going to paint it for anybody.

I'm sure there are other things, but this is what comes to mind off the top of my head. ☺

Come back tomorrow and hear about my "soggy side"

Thankful Thursday

This week I particularly needed to remind myself of the things I am thankful for.

Long-distance telephone and phone cards
Orange juice
Bacon
Homemade yogurt
Homemade fudgy wudgy brownies
A little boy who loves to help
A bigger boy who loves to help with his little brother
That I can sew, that I enjoy it, and that I’m even able to bring in a little money doing something I love
That we got paid this week
That we have our taxes done and will have our refund soon (and that it’s bigger than I expected!)
That Bear hasn’t really nursed at night in a week!
Finally, I am thankful for cloth pads. They are so much more comfortable than disposables…it was a miscarriage that spurred me to make the switch in the first place, but this is the first time I’ve actually used them for one. I’m thankful that they are comfortable. I’m thankful for velour! I’m thankful that when I used them all up in one day I was able to make some new ones while I waited for the laundry—and don’t underestimate the happiness quotient associated with pretty new pads! I sew a lot of pads for other people, but it had been a looong time since I made any new ones for myself, and I’d never made myself any with velour!

WFMW Have a Happy Period--no, really!

I hate the kotex ads, but the idea of a happy period is one worth considering! After all, for years we've heard about 'the curse' and 'that time of the month' in every negative way imaginable...but it doesn't have to be a negative thing!
Here are a few things you can do that can make it a much happier experience for you (and all the people who live with you!)
♥ Red Raspberry Leaf (in teas, capsules, or tinctures) RRL promotes general reproductive health, and will reduce cramps,
♥ Drink your water! Being dehydrated will exacerbate anything, and most people are dehydrated most of the time. If you feel thirsty, you are already dehydrated.
♥ Take calcium and magnesium (magnesium is in chocolate, which is probably why you crave it, but the sugar will increase symptoms, so don't do it!) (RRL has both calcium and magnesium, as well as iron which is important because you're losing iron with the bleeding)
♥ Avoid caffeine, sugar, grease and salt.
♥ Drink chamomile tea.
♥ Exercise! Get those endorphins flowing, and it will lift your mood. Some women also report that it helps with cramps. If you're able to get out in the sunshine that should help too.
♥ If you can't get sunshine, try Cod Liver Oil--it is like liquid sunshine for your body, providing vitamins A and D as well as essential fatty acids. It's a major mood booster. (The brand I linked is actually quite pleasant--I mix it in yogurt or orange juice and it's not fishy at all!)
♥ Vitamin E can help with cramping pain (it must be chelated and powdered, the oil will not work).
♥ Vitamin B can help with stress and mood
♥ Try some yoga--cat's pose and child's pose are both good ones for menstrual woes. Aside from the relaxation and improved circulation, yoga can also release endorphins and improve mood.
♥ Many women report that switching to cloth pads or menstrual cups shortens the duration and heaviness of their flow, as well as reducing cramping.

Works For Me Wednesday is brought to you by Rocks in my Dryer. Come share your tips, or see what works for others! Click the icon above to go to this week's entry.

For the Love of a Cup

No, don't you dare laugh at the title of this post. I really do love my diva cup. It has changed the way I feel about menstruation. At one point, far too long ago, I promised to tell you about menstrual cups. Well, recent events have reminded me about that, so here we go. (yes, you interpreted that correctly, I finally have good ol' AF back!)

Answers to the Frequently Asked Questions:

• Yes, I know it looks like a funnel. I promise, it's not a funnel--there's no hole in the bottom. That 'stem' is a handle that facilitates getting it back out...
• Yes, it looks pretty wide, but yes, it will fit in you, even if you're a tiny little thing. I promise. Just think about what else can fit in there...this is not any bigger. I promise.
• No, it's not hard. Geesh, do you think I'm a masochist?! It's soft and bendy...like surgical tubing or, um, I dunno. Something soft.
• No, it won't give you a massive hickey when you pull it out. Just give it a little squeeze on the bottom and it breaks the seal and slips out quite easily.
• No, it doesn't invite infection--you wash it off in warm water between uses, and many women boil it for a few minutes after each period.
  

And, in case you ever tried "Instead" no, it's not like those. Those never worked for me. this works like a charm.

So here are some real reasons to make the switch:

• Most women experience shorter periods (mine went from 8 days to 3-4).
• It's eco-friendly
• It's economical ($30 will last you 10 years)
• It requires less attention than disposable options (it only needs to be changed once every 12 or so hours)
• I can't feel it--I could always feel tampons
• It will never slide down when full...it might leak after 14 hours on the heavy day of your period because you totally forgot it was in there because you couldn't feel it (not that I would know of course), but it will not slip down and become painful.
  

I have only one caveat about menstrual cups: if you are uncomfortable with sticking your fingers in yourself, well, this is probably not a good choice for you.

The official menstrual cup reviews page includs reviews of, and links to the diva cup, keeper, moon cup, luna cup, lunette, femmecup, and lady cup. They are all very similar, with the diva, moon cup, and keeper being the most common. (The former two are made with medical grade silicone, and the last of laytex rubber.)

Here is another useful review of the diva cup. (The author is highly amusing, she just favors the use of certain euphemisms for her girly regions, that I, um, don't...)

If you've got questions, post to the comments...you know I have no shame and I'll answer them all!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Answers!
Q~Why the shorter periods?
I don't know of any hard science on this, but I suspect two things: one, the cup collects, rather than absorbing. A tampon can absorb only so much, and then it becomes a dam, holding back any additional flow. The cup allows everything to come down as fast as it wants to (the first day especially). I don't know that the total volume of blood is any different, but it seems to be released more efficiently.
The second thing is that I have heard the hypothesis that disposable menstrual products actually contain chemicals that increase bleeding. Whether this is intentional (to increase sales of the products) or unintentional (because the manufacturing process simply creates a toxic product to begin with) I don't know. I have not been able to find evidence to back this up, but I have heard it repeatedly, and everyone I know who has switched to a cup or to cloth pads has reported a shorter period afterward.
Q~Does it really last 10 years? The site says to replace it yearly.
Well, I've had mine for about 3 years...of course, I only used it for about 6 months before getting pregnant. I had heard 10 years from several sources...I've never heard 1. I suspect there is some potential for the cup to wear or crack or something, so they recommend replacing annually as a preventative measure...but I sincerely doubt that it's really necessary to replace that often. For myself at least, I fully expect mine to last 10 years or more...but that's partly because I won't be using it every month during that time due to babies. :)
Q~ What do you think of the diva wash they offer on the site?
I don't know, I've never tried it. I am pretty happy with warm water and a little mild soap + boiling it occasionally...
Q~what if you have a IUD to prevent pregnancy. Do these interfere with those at all (as in knocking them out of place)?
I'm not 100% certain where the IUD sits...but I believe the IUD is "intra-uterine" right? So no, it would not be a problem. The cup sits below the cervix, in the vagina--not up in the cervix and certainly not in the uterus. ☺

Caring for Cloth Pads

Several commenters asked about some more specifics on caring for cloth pads... I apologize for taking so long in responding to this.
First of all, if you happen to use cloth diapers, you can throw the pads in with them and wash them in the same ways. Simple!
For those who don't have a cloth diapered heiny in the house, I'll run through the basics of cloth menstrual pad care. There are several basic parts (numbered), and several extra, optional steps (in italics)...so feel free to use these recommendations as you prefer.
1--after use, I rinse the pad out in the sink with hot or warm water, then place soiled pads in cold water in a container with a lid. Most women keep a small tupperware or ceramic pot under the sink or on the back of the toilet. So long as it has a lid, it will not smell. (Some ladies like to put tea tree oil, lavender essential oil, hydrogen peroxide, oxy clean, vinegar, or a little soap in with the water.) If you are out and about, just put the pad in a waterproof bag or pouch, and put it in the water when you get home.
2--refresh water once a day to prevent odor.
3--wash on hot (some ladies swear it has to be cold to prevent staining, but I have never had problems), rinse at any temperature, dry in drier (or hang dry). Do not use any type of fabric softener.
4--if, somehow, something did get stained, let it soak in hydrogen peroxide or oxy-clean for a few hours. It'll come out (at least, it always has for me!)

Pretty simple, huh?

A while ago I saw a pattern for a washable knitted tampon. It was brilliant--it rolled up for use, unrolled for washing, and was knit in pretty cotton colors. I am thinking of doing some experimenting to try to create some for my shop, but I am in no hurry. I (like many others who prefer internal menstrual protection), have a menstrual cup. (I like the diva cup, though there are several brands out there.) I'll write about cups sometime soon.

You Use Cloth for WHAT?!

This was my initial reaction when I heard of cloth menstrual pads. I mean, blood, on fabric, on purpose? Ewww, right?
Then I started thinking.

1. I'm ok with cloth diapers, and poop is grosser than blood.
2. If I get some blood (menstrual or otherwise) on my clothing, I wash them...no big deal. It comes out pretty easily in fact.
   
3. Disposable pads chafe (this is painfully evident when you have to use them postpartum for several consecutive weeks).

So I finally took the plunge and tried out cloth pads.
Oh wow!
Yes, they are a little bulkier than the disposables you are probably used to. They are also much softer and easier to get used to (wouldn't you prefer something a bit bulky that just feels like regular soft underwear over something thin that feels like plastic?). I have applied cloth diaper technology to my pads and they are very absorbent, extremely soft, leak-proof, and even wick moisture inside so that I'm not left feeling wet.
There are other advantages too. Cloth is eco-friendly of course, but if that were the only reason I would not have bothered with the switch. Besides the actual feel of the materials, the chemicals in disposable pads cause irritation for many girls/women. Most women report having shorter periods when using cloth pads. Many women say they have fewer or milder cramps (or none at all) when they use cloth. Cloth is respectful of yourself and your menstrual flow (menstrual blood is not a dirty thing that must be thrown away, it's just a part of yourself and who you are as a woman!).

If you've ever thought about trying cloth pads, I heartily recommend this site for all kinds of information about different styles, brands, and options. Personally, after looking through dozens of types of pads, I couldn't find anything I loved, so I made my own, which of course I now sell at LilBees. I have never found a style I like quite as well, but of course not everyone likes the same thing, so like I said, it's worth a visit to the Cloth Pad Reviews forum. (Yup, I just linked the same thing twice. It's worth a visit!)

If you have questions about the care/washing of cloth pads, let me know in the comments and I will post about that soon.

By the way, I know a few of my dear readers use my pattern (or my pads!) If you do so, would you be willing to leave feedback on it here. There are a lot of sellers listed there, and while I've had good feedback on etsy, I haven't gotten any feedback on this Cloth Pad Reviews forum and I'm feeling a little sad about it. You do have to register an account to post there, but it's free and it's not like you have to visit regularly...and I would sure appreciate having a little recognition there if you like my things!

Intervening With Nature and Bringing Down Women

I am a woman. Yup, female. When one is female, there are certain things that go along with the territory...cycles of hormones: menstruation, pregnancy, childbirth, lactation...

Frankly I am insulted and offended by the way our modern culture tries to squelch these natural parts of femininity.

For starters, they tell us that having a period is dirty. It should be hidden, covered with perfumes and flushed or thrown away. Furthermore, a menstruating woman should behave exactly the same on those days as she does on any other day of the month--never mind that her body is letting go of blood, iron, and energy. What?! What idiot came up with these ideas?! It was either a man or a woman who wanted to be a man. A period is a symbol of fertility, not weakness! It should be observed, not ignored. No, I don't save my menstrual blood and use it to water my houseplants (although I hear that such plants thrive). On the other hand, I don't try to pretend that it doesn't exist. On the first day of my period I take a day off--I don't worry about trying to get much done. I make a simple dinner (often one I've frozen ahead of time). I accept that my body is taking a day off. It's all part of the cycle.

We have pills and drugs to counteract PMS. PreMenstrual Syndrome is partly caused by hormones, but actually mostly because of poor nutrition and lousy self-care. Take a nap, drink more water, lay off the sugar, avoid caffeine, and consider taking a little red raspberry leaf. You will most likely find that PMS is not inevitable, but is actually like most other pains--a sign that something is wrong!

Pregnancy is part of being a woman. If you are not willing to be pregnant, do not participate in pregnancy-causing activities. I feel very strongly about that. I am generally disgusted with birth control hormones and the havoc they wreck on women's bodies. Hormones fluctuate in a delicate balance, and 'the pill' (any of them) interferes with that. Most pills advertise shorter, lighter periods (I can tell you a safer way to get that!). One pill claims to 'beat' PMS with a commercial singing "We're not gonna take it" (take what, healthy fertility?!) One pill boasts of interfering so much that a period only comes every third month. Does that scare anyone else?!

Once pregnant, many women grieve their condition. Even if they are excited about having a baby join the family, they complain about the process. I've been pregnant: I know about the morning sickness, aches, pains, and exhaustion. It's part of the package deal. They schedule inductions and plan cesarean sections for the convenience of predictability, rather than out of any medical need. Even those who wait for nature's timing for labor are likely to demand medications which will numb their bodies and interfere with the natural process (and likely lead to other interventions). Giving birth is a rite of passage! I don't enjoy pain, and I'm certainly no martyr. I did not choose unmedicated birth out of machismo or a desire to boast to my children about how hard I worked to get them here. I chose it because it is how birth is meant to be. It is how our bodies are meant to work. It is what our Creator intended. And yes it is HARD work, but it is not bad. Sure, sometimes something goes amiss, and in those cases inductions, epidurals, and cesareans can work wonders...but they should not be routine. Intervening with nature should never be routine.

And when we do give birth to that tiny, helpless, baby, our amazing bodies know just what to do: they make nourishment for it. First colostrum, then milk. Milk which changes as the baby ages. Milk which has a high fat content and helps to mylenize the baby's rapidly developing brain cells. Milk which contains stem cells. How amazing and perfect is this?! And yet many women choose to take drugs to dry up their supply, or else wean the child long before he is ready. Instead they offer the child milk from another mammal--one whose genetic makeup (and milk) is very dissimilar to our own. Are we mad?! Where is the logic in this?

Why do women think they should be men? No periods. No hormones. No pregnancies. No labor. No baby at the breast... Is androgeny really so desirable? Throughout history men have always found a particular body shape more attractive than any other: a sort of an hourglass shape...a shape which indicates fertility. In other words, the most attractive woman is one who is not afraid of her body and what it can do.
Stand up! Don't be ashamed of your body and its processes. Be aware, and be proud! You are a Phenomenal Woman!

Happy Things

Yay for little happy things!

For example, I just posted this wetbag for sale yesterday, and today it sold! YAY! (which just goes to show that people besides me DO like leopard print! I knew it!)

Also I just learned about a program called Goods 4 Girls. Many of you may have seen the TV commercials about how many young girls in Africa are unable to attend school because they don't have any kind of menstrual protection...well, while kotex is making all their adds about how they will donate a tiny percentage of sales to help these girls, Goods 4 Girls is actually sending them cloth pads--a dozen washable cloth pads will provide for a girl for years, not just for one cycle! I'm talking to somebody right now about setting up my store that people can buy my pads to donate (and I'll ship directly to G4G). I'm going to offer a discount for folks who donate because I think it's a great cause to support!

Cloth Pad Sewing Tutorial

I have been thinking about doing this for a while, and today I finally did... I took a whole bunch of pictures of the process and put up a tutorial for sewing my pad pattern. If you are interested, you can go see it here. In the past, if someone wanted a copy of the pattern, I've told them that if they wanted to come over and trace it, they were welcome to it! I've also shown people how to sew it... Now I sell the pattern in my etsy store, and I basically just charge enough to cover my expenses and time to copy and mail it. I had written out some instructions with little drawings, but a picture is worth a thousand words...thus the online tutorial. The direct link is http://www.geocities.com/brightonwoman/padtutorial.html

By the way, for any of you who have my pattern, or who have bought a pad from me, would you be kind enough to go leave a review of it here? The old forums at moonhutnaturals.com have closed, and this one is now open, but nobody has reviewed me yet there! Thanks!