(in the interest of needing something lighthearted this week...or at least something a little snarky...)
Every time my father saw a newborn, be it his own or someone else’s, he pronounced that it looked like “a cross between a Tibetan monk and a Himalayan gorilla.” Of course we always argued with him, saying that our newest little brother or sister was actually very attractive in his or her squished, red, hairless phase…but dad would never relent. Nope, he’d say, newborns are not cute. Within a few months we’d all forgiven him because by then he would agree that said sibling had outgrown the ugly stage and was now cute like the rest of his older kids. Unfortunately, some children do not become cute.
Every so often someone posts some pictures of her kids on her blog, or emails them out to all the family. I know I’m supposed to leave comments about how cute the kids are…but sometimes I just can’t, because some kids are not cute. There’s no other way to say it. Some kids are funny looking and some kids are plain, while a few are even downright ugly; but some kids are definitely not cute. This is only logical; after all, not all adults are cute either, so it stands to reason that those not-cute adults probably came from not-cute kids. It also stands to reason that those not-cute adults would produce additional not-cute kids.
The problem is not so much that the kids themselves are not cute; after all, more than one ugly duckling has grown into a lovely swan. No, the real problem is that, inevitably, their parents think they ARE cute. Parents, somehow, are blinded to reality when it comes to their own offspring.
In case you were wondering, none of this applies to me: MY kids are cute.
(why yes, this is what we do for entertainment in Pelican--and yes, that is our general store)