Making Tallow Candles--part 1 (rendering the tallow)

We bought a half a beef last fall. They asked if we wanted the scraps, and since I believe in using every part of the animal (since it died for us, I don't want to waste any part of its life), we said yes.
I surmised that the 'scraps' would be soup bones and the like.
I was wrong.
We got a box full of, well, scraps. There was some bone (which did go to make stock of course), but most of it was fat. Cows are fatty animals in case you didn't know or have forgotten (and there is nothing like a whole box full of fat to make sure that I will never ever forget!)

So what does one do with a whole bunch of cow fat? Well render it into tallow and make candles of course!

First, all that fat/gristle/unknown stuff has to be chopped into little pieces  (you can see the box there behind my bowl of bits--it was pretty full).

Second, put the bits in a big pan with some water, and boil for a loooong time until all the fat becomes liquid (keep an eye on it, because the water will boil off and then things get ugly and stinky and just generally bad...)

Pour the contents of the pan out through a strainer. BE CAREFUL, THIS STUFF IS REALLY HOT!! The things I read recommended straining twice, which I did (once with a bigger-hole metal colander and then once through a fine-mesh strainer). Once it is well strained, pour the remaining liquid--which will be murky--into a dish to separate and cool. The water and fat will separate and the fat will rise to the top and solidify. Give it at least a few hours, I have had the best results with letting it go overnight. (I put it in bread pans here, the square shape made it easier to get the tallow block out later.)

Once the tallow is solid, use a table knife to separate the tallow from the edge of the container. Dump out the water into the toilet. (The bits of tallow will clog up your sink drains, it has to go in the toilet!!) Set out the tallow to dry/drain (I put it on paper towels). It usually seems to have some gunk along it where it bordered the water, so I use the table knife to scrape that scuzzy part off and put it in the garbage or toilet.

I like to let it air out for at least a few hours before using it. If you do not have immediate plans for it, put it in a bag in the freezer.

Coming next: part 2, making the candles!!

New Moon

In keeping with MotherWheel, and observing the wheel of the year, our family is observing not just the 8 sabbats but also the esbats, or the new and full moons. We're not holding rituals or anything, but on each new moon I am holding a personal fast of some sort. Last month, for example, I abstained from sugar of all sorts for several days (to detox from the holidays). On the night of the full moon, we have a family feast (which is to say that we have a fairly normal family dinner accented by silver candles!) I am already finding that the mindfulness of this regular fasting/feasting cycle is very grounding. Today I'm cross-posting here what I posted over on MotherWheel.

I have decided to name each moon this year, according to my hopes and intentions for that lunation. I began last month with my Purification Moon. Today is the new moon of what I am calling my Vision Moon.

I've been thinking about Imbolc and Candlemas, and something that keeps coming to me is that this is a day that falls within the darkness, and yet celebrates the light that we put out into the world. Candles are an obvious metaphor, and I am reminded of Matthew 5:
Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.
Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Candles and light are not just a metaphor for testimony, they are also a metaphor for vision I think. For our focus. The light of one candle in a darkened room will draw the attention of all who enter. We see the flame and cannot help but go toward it. Even an infant, who does not know what the candle is, will immediately focus that direction.

The light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.

John 1:5

Even if the darkness does not comprehend the light, the light still comes, and cannot be ignored. In this month where the darkness still has hold over our earth, the little lights of our candles are standing up and being seen, and cannot be quenched.

This lunation, I will ponder and meditate on Vision: what I am focusing on, where I am going, and also what kind of light I am putting out to the world.
During this new moon, my fast (I'm planning three days) will be from the internet...so I'll see ya later. ☺

As a closing, I wanted to share this song:

Be Thou My Vision

Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;

Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.

Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,

Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;

I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;

Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;

Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;

Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;

Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:

Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.

Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,

Thou mine Inheritance, now and always:

Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,

High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art.

High King of Heaven, my victory won,

May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heaven’s Sun!

Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,

Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all.

If you are unfamiliar with this psalm, and want to hear it--words and music--try this link. If you just want to hear the melody, or want something to sing along with (especially if you've adapted the words for your own purposes), here is a lovely, simple, instrumental version of it from youtube

Celebrating Imbolc/Candlemas

Imbolc is tomorrow (on February 2), so today's post is to share some background on the Sabbat, as well as give ideas of ways to observe it. (Please note that, as with all sabbats, the celebrations/observations traditionally begin at sundown on the night before, in this case, tonight!) If you'd like to learn more about this holiday, check out the posts on MotherWheel.

Background:
The First of February belongs to Brigid, (Brighid, Brigit, Bride,) the Celtic goddess who in later times became revered as a Christian saint. Originally, her festival on February 1 was known as Imbolc  (pronounced "IM-bulk" or "EM-bowlk") or also called Oimealg, ("IM-mol'g), two names which refer to the lactation of the ewes, the flow of milk that heralds the return of the life-giving forces of spring. Later, the Catholic Church replaced this festival with Candlemas Day on February 2, which is dedicated to the Virgin Mary and features candlelight processions. The powerful figure of Brigid the Light-Bringer overlights both pagan and Christian celebrations.[source link]

Brigid

Brigid is the goddess not just of fire, but also of hearth and home, smithcraft (blacksmiths, goldsmiths, etc), poetry and creation, healing, women's health, and childbirth. She is an incarnation of the Maiden form of the goddess, and our word "bride" comes from her name.
Imbolc is the time of Blessing of the seeds and consecration of agricultural  tools. It marks the center point of the dark half of the year. It is  the festival of the Maiden, for from this day to March 21st, it is her  season to prepare for growth and renewal. Brighid's snake emerges from  the womb of the Earth Mother to test the weather, (the origin of Ground  Hog Day), and in many places the first Crocus flowers began to spring  forth from the frozen earth. [source link]

Brigid's Wheel aka Brigit's Cross

When Ireland was Christianized, veneration of the Pagan Goddess Brigid was transformed into that of St. Brigit, said to be the human daughter of a Druid... Pagan lore was incorporated into the Christian traditions  and legends associated with Her as a saint. She  was associated with miracles and fertility. Into the 18th century a women's only shrine was kept to her in Kildare (meaning Church of the Oak) in Ireland. There, nineteen nuns tended Her continually burning sacred flame. An ancient song was sung to Her: "Brigid, excellent woman, sudden flame, may the bright fiery sun take us to the lasting kingdom."  [source link]

According to some sources, the Celts celebrated an early version of Groundhog Day on Imbolc too – only with a serpent, singing this poem:

Thig an nathair as an toll
(The serpent will come from the hole)
la donn Bride
(on the brown day of Bride (Brighid)
Ged robh tri traighean dh’an
(though there may be three feet of snow)
Air leachd an lair
(On the surface of the ground.)

In Christianity, this date (about 40 days after Christmas) marks the time when Mary and Joseph would have taken Christ to the temple, and also the conclusion of Mary's purification. In this tradition, St Brigid was the midwife who attended Mary at Christ's birth.

Symbolism:
purity, growth, renewal, new beginnings, commitment/dedication, birth, creativity, healing, brides, virgins

Symbols:
white flowers, candles , torches, grains, seeds, acorns, plow, snakes, poetry, blacksmiths/goldsmiths,

Foods:

• poppyseed cakes or muffins
• breads, cakes, scones
• seeds (pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, etc)
• dairy products (milk, cheese, yogurt, etc)

Activities:

Imbolc decoration on etsy

• On the evening before, each family member leaves one item of clothing  outside for Brigid to bless. In the morning the clothing is brought back  inside, with Brigid's blessing of healing and protection (see here).
• Make herbal salves, teas, or other healing things.
• Make your own butter.
• Read scriptures about light, the Light of Christ, candles, or fires, as well as the things they stand for (testimony, example, etc)  (Matt 5 is a good place to start)
• Sing hymns or other songs about light, such as Pass it On.
• Use straw to make a Brigid's Wheel, or a broom, to hang on or above your door to bless your home
• Make fire starters
• Make a Brighid's Crown or a Priapic Wand.
• Go outside and encourage things to grow, perhaps while waving your priapic wand, and/or with a verse like this "Wake, wake, plants in the earth, / spring is a time of light and rebirth. / Hear, hear this magical sound, / and grow, grow, out of the ground."
• Sweep out your home to cleanse and purify it. 
• Clean your fireplace/hearth and sweep out the ashes
• Write or read poems 
• Since Brigid is the goddess over childbirth, share the birth stories of family members together
• Candlemas is the day when the Catholic Church blesses their candles for the year. If you use candles in your home (especially if you use them for spiritual purposes) you might consider blessing them.
• Light candles.
• Make candles! or Ice candles.
• Have a candlelit meal with your family
• If any early flowers have come up where you life, bring some inside.
• If you grow a garden, this might be a good day to start your seeds indoors.
• Plant a garden of healing herbs.
• Help at or donate to a women's shelter, women's health organization, or pregnancy/childbirth support group.
• (if you have other ideas, please share them in the comments!)

 
Source links:

• http://www.chalicecentre.net/imbolc.htm (this page has a lot of background on Brigid, and a bit on candlemas)
• http://www.wicca.com/celtic/akasha/imbolclore.htm
• http://www.circlesanctuary.org/pholidays/imbolc.htm (includes lists of symbols, colors, foods, animals, etc associated with Imbolc)
• http://www.circlesanctuary.org/pholidays/candlemascustomslore.htm
• http://paganwiccan.about.com/od/imbolcfebruary2/p/Imbolc_History.htm
• http://annieshearth.blogspot.com/2010/06/brigit-celtic-goddess-of-fire.html (LOTS of information about Brigid)

Arctic Homestead

When I was growing up, my mother always started off our homeschool day by reading to us. She read us biographies and historical fiction mostly, counting it toward our history studies. I think I was 8 or 9 when she read Tisha to us. It was about a young woman who took a job teaching school in rural Alaska in the early 1900s.
I was fascinated.
I guess that was really the beginning for me, of wanting to come to Alaska. I re-read the book a couple of times in my teenage years too. As I was finishing college, I was contemplating getting dual certification (Alaska and my then-homestate of Washington have a reciprocal certification agreement) and I was going to come teach for a year or two in the middle of nowhere in Alaska, save up my money, and then go back south and get married. I was going to do what Tisha did...only Tisha found a spouse up in Alaska and stayed...and, well, if that happened that was ok too.
Only I found a spouse before I got a chance to go to Alaska and get rich. So I stayed poor and got married, and I'm not sure whether Alaska was still on my radar or not...I certainly wasn't thinking about it in any concrete way. But less than 4 years into our marriage we had an opportunity to move our family to Alaska, and even though we had never made serious plans to do so, we both jumped at the opportunity. Sometimes, something is so in your blood that you don't have to talk about it. I hadn't realized that my husband felt the call of the wild too, but he did, and we came.
And when we got here, we realized that it was home.

In the early part of our marriage, we had talked about buying a little piece of land where we could have a big garden, some fruit trees, and maybe raise some chickens or something. Now that we have realized that Alaska is home--more particularly that this region is where we want to stay for the long term (employment permitting)--now we have begun researching what exactly will be involved in creating an independent, sustainable, mostly-off-grid homestead for our family in this area. We've been getting books from the library, and reading up on everything from yurts and earthbag homes to cob houses and underground dwellings. We're learning about building with logs and how to use passive solar. We plan on heating with wood and geothermal energy, and will probably have a sod roof. We're reading about wind and hydropower. We know we'll need to build a greenhouse for our fruit trees and some of our vegetables. We're studying up on breeds of chickens and sheep to find which ones are gentle with children, which ones are hearty in cold weather, and which ones are the best for eating (and eggs, and wool...) The more we talk about it, the more excited we become. We know we need to sell our house down south before we can buy land here, and we don't want to buy land until we have tenure with a school district, so as to avoid what happened last time we bought a house (getting laid off and not being able to find another job within commuting distance of the place we owned!) So this is a 5 year plan at least...but it is a plan, and we are doing our reading, and it's exciting every time we talk about it.
Lots of people talk about things, but if the last few years are anything to go by, we are not just talkers, we are doers. We are the people who hold hands, hold our breath, and just jump already.

Recently, a fellow Alaskan friend recommended the book Arctic Homestead by Norma Cobb. She was another jumper. She and her husband took their five small children and settled in the wilderness north of Fairbanks in the 1970s. I admit I am not that daring, I have no desire to be that far north. I'll stay on my very sub-arctic peninsula thank you...but reading her story was inspiring, and reminded me of the reasons why I want to live off the land, with the land, in the land...and why I want to do it here. (It was also a thoroughly delightful read, so whether you have a homesteader's mindset or not I recommend the book!)


I conclude with a post from the book that seems to capture the way I feel about living in Alaska.

"There was breathtaking beauty in the howling of the wolves, the glisten and sparkle of new snow beneath lights, the splendid aurora borealis that never failed to fill me with wonder. It was as though God hung the great curtains of fire to fill space with myriad colors of dancing forms and vast spears and shafts of light flashing from one horizon to the next in a dazzling display of His power and majesty."

Frugal Friday: Water

Perhaps none of these will be anything new for you, but one way to make a little wiggle room in your budget is to lower your utility bills by cutting back on your water/electricity/gas use. Today, ideas for reducing water usage.

• Set a timer when you shower. How long do you think you usually spend in the shower? It's very likely that it's longer than you think. Whether you're aiming for a true 5 min shower, or just wanting to take a couple of minutes off your standard, try a timer!
• Bathe/shower with company! Seriously, most kids like to take baths together, and I've taken a baby into the shower with me more than a few times. Couples can share showers in both romantic or purely practical ways.
• If your kids don't like to bathe together (or you have too many to fit into the tub at once), try to get them to take baths back to back, using the same tub (or perhaps just adding a little more hot for round two, but not having to refill the whole tub).
• Don't wash your hair so often (if your hair is to your shoulders, you can probably make it at least 3-4 days between washes. My hair--to my waist--goes a week pretty easily.)
• Use the 'short wash' cycle on your dishwasher
• Use the smaller load size settings on your washing machine if you're running a smaller load.
• Fill the dishwasher or washing machine full before running a load.
• If/as things wear out, buy a more efficient washing machine or dishwasher, low-flow toilets, and low-flow showerheads.
• If you can afford it, consider replacing inefficient things even if they have not worn out yet.
• Install a toggle switch in your showerhead so that you can turn off the water flow (without turning off the water and losing your temperature settings). Turn it off to apply your soap/shampoo, then turn it back on to rinse... you might be surprised how much water goes straight down the drain in those seconds.
• Strip cloth diapers with the 'boil them on the stove' method rather than the 'run them through 11 cycles in the washer' method. (I have a front loader washing machine so I have to do it this way, but I have found it faster and more effective as well as saving water. You just have to keep an eye on them so that you don't singe fabric or melt snaps!)
• Designate specific cups or water bottles for each person (we have color-coding here, one color per family member). If your family is anything like my family, this will save several unidentified half-cupfuls of water several times a day. (We mostly stick with the colored camelbak water bottles for water, and the colored cups for milk or juice.) 
• If you live in an area where you need to water your garden or lawn, set timers so that you don't water for longer that necessary.
• Consider collecting rainwater from your roof into a barrel and using that (for watering plants if you don't trust it to be clean).
• Don't flush every time ("if it's yellow--let it mellow; if it's brown--flush it down") 
• When you have a bucketful of dirty water (from scrubbing the floor for example), set the bucket by the toilet, and pour it into the bowl to flush next time it needs flushing.
• If you're building/remodeling, consider installing a grey water recycling system (which uses the water drained from things like your dishwasher to do things like flush the toilets). One of the simplest forms I've seen is the sink-toilet combo.  --->

What water saving ideas do you have?

Getting the Mail in Alaska in Wintertime

1. Decide that you want the mail more than you want to stay warm. (Sometimes it takes two or three days to reach this decision--but if I know there's a netflix out there, or we're expecting a package from someone, I usually buck up and go for it.)
2. Collect all the appropriate paraphernalia: coat, boots, mittens, hat, mailbox key, lighter...
3. Put mailbox key in armpit (inside coat). This is optional, but it will most likely speed things up later on.
4. Zip up, mittens on, venture forth...the mailboxes are one driveway over. Don't drop that key out of your armpit on the way m'kay? If you do it will be a booger to find, cuz remember it's dark 3/4 of the day, and little keys don't show up very well in snow...
5. Once at the mailboxes, light the lighter, using your body to shield the flame from the wind, and hold the flame on the mailbox lock until it gets really frosty, and then gets all wet, and then the water runs out of it... this may take anywhere from 30-90 seconds. Once the water is running then the lock is probably thawed enough to get the key in.
6. Retrieve the key from your armpit (it stays much warmer there than it would have in your pocket, sparing you a key-heating step, which is good, because holding the flame on the key makes it vulnerable to bending or breaking, not that I would know...)
7. Put the key in the lock. If you can. You may need to reapply the lighter, or you may need to push the key really really hard. Or both. Try not to bend the key, it doesn't work after you do that.
8. Turn the key. This is actually the hardest part of the whole process, as the mailbox keys are cheap little things...
9. Retrieve mail, close box, and turn key straight again. (OK, I may have lied, that may be the hardest part.)
10. Retrieve key. If you can. Muahahahaaaaaaaa!!!
11. Hurry home, go through your mail, ask yourself why you live in Alaska. Then  hang up your coat, put away your boots, put on some tea, and remind yourself why you live in Alaska.

Of course, when the temperature rises to around 40 then all of this is no longer necessary...we get the mail daily in those spells!

Garlic and Sapphires by Ruth Reichl

on amazon here

I did it again. I browsed the 'new arrivals' section at the library. Interesting things happen when I do that, and this was no exception.

Garlic and Sapphires? Two of my favorite things! So I picked up the book.
The subtitle read "the secret life of a critic in disguise."

Whatever, let's go back to the garlic part.

So I brought the book home.


Ruth Reichl is a famous food critic (I  had no idea). She had been famous for a while in LA, and then was hired to be the big new food critic for the NYTimes. Of course, all the big restaurants in NY planned to show her a good time so they could get their four stars...only Ruth was smart about people as well as about food, and she beat them at their own game. She worked up some elaborate disguises and went to these restaurants as normal people, rather than as her famous self. Oh she went as herself too of course, but then she wrote about all the visits. Boy oh boy were some chefs in for some surprises!!! She called them on their two-facedness where she found it, and withheld stars for it too. Ooooo, so mean! But so so right!

Of course most of the book follows her visits to various fancy places and discusses all manner of foods (many of them mouth-watering). She writes about her process in inventing each disguise. She also talks about her family--and how she goes to a place where she "normally wouldn't be caught dead eating" except that it's her sons birthday and he really wants to go...and she realizes that reputations are silly things, and that the quality of a night out is more about the company than the cost of the meal. She goes with friends to little hidden ethnic eateries and revels in authentic food that is excellent even if it's not 'posh.' At one highly acclaimed (but very poor) restaurant she even throws off her disguise in disgust mid-meal...but I won't ruin that story. It was very very funny.

While food and disguises are all very fun, Reichl's down to earth style was the thing I liked most about the book. It wasn't just that she was trying to get the good stories, although of course she was. It wasn't just that she was looking for the best food, although she was finding that too. In the long run, she also finds that the process of 'getting real' for her reviews helps her 'get real' about her life too, and leads to her eventual decision to leave her post as a full-time food critic and to come home to cook more with her family, which is where food is best anyway. With a happy ending like that, of course I liked the book.

Pregnancy After Miscarriage

After a miscarriage, some couples do not want to think about babies for a while, but many want to try to conceive again right away. Here are a few thoughts based on my own experiences, and on things that friends have shared with me.

1--Be honest about why you do (or do not) want to get pregnant again right away. It may be a manifestation of denial--wanting to hurry up and be pregnant again so that you can pretend that you were never 'unpregnant.' You may carry the hope that conceiving again will help heal the loss. I can say from experience that a new pregnancy may help distract you from the loss, but unless you are well on the way to healing already it will not magically fix anything.
If you do not want to get pregnant, is it a product of fear, or simply a desire to wait? It's important to be sensitive to your spouse's feelings and desires too. I don't think there is any one right answer, and certainly not a simple one, but realize that both perspectives are valid.

2--Realize that being pregnant after having miscarried is a scary thing for most of us. There is an ever present fear of miscarrying again. Women who have never lost a baby may have some concerns about miscarriage, but they do not compare to when you have actually been there before. We tend to fixate on every little thing as either a sign that all is well, or a sign that we're about to miscarry again. For example, vaginal moisture is common in pregnancy, but after having lost babies I found myself running to the bathroom six times a day to check and make sure that what I was feeling wasn't blood. When I began to feel better from my morning sickness, I was terrified that it might mean that I was about to lose the baby.

3--Consider your timing. Different providers give different advice. My first OB told me that we should abstain from procreative activities for so long as I was bleeding, and then use preventative measures until after I had had at least one normal period. Essentially his advice was to let my body figure out that it is not pregnant before trying to get it pregnant again.
I have also heard the recommendation that after a baby you should wait for a time equal to (or longer than) the length of the pregnancy. So after a full-term baby you should wait 9 months, after a 13wk miscarriage you should wait 3 months, after a 5wk miscarriage you should wait at least a month, and so on.
On the other hand, I have heard many midwives and mothers say that that first ovulation after miscarriage (in other words, before that 'one normal period') is particularly fertile, and that if you really want to get pregnant again then you should try right away. I believe the theory is that the body doesn't figure out that it's not pregnant, and is therefore more welcoming of a new embryo. I don't know if there is any science to that or if it's just an old wives tale, but I do know an awful lot of women--including myself--who have conceived in the first month following a miscarriage.

Music Monday: Shakira Waka Waka (world cup official video)

Such a catchy song, so upbeat and fun, and it makes everybody want to just get up and dance.

Speaking the Name

I was talking with my husband about this recently--we have the commandment to not take God's name in vain, and most of us take it to the extreme of not ever using His name at all. Yet I was reading in the scriptures recently, and came across this:

Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing; and establish a house, even a house of prayer, a house of fasting, a house of faith, a house of learning, a house of glory, a house of order, a house of God;

That your incomings may be in the name of the Lord; that your outgoings may be in the name of the Lord; that all your salutations may be in the name of the Lord, with uplifted hands unto the Most High.

                              --Doctrine & Covenants 88:119-120

When teaching or discussing these verses, we always seem to focus on the first verse--about being organized, prepared, and having a "house of God." However, on this reading, I was struck very strongly by the bolded part--that all your salutations may be in the name of the Lord.
Wow.
All my salutations.
I think that means we should be using phrases like "God bless you" or "go with God" or "thank God for ___" (meant in seriousness of course, not flippantly) and of course the glorious phrase "Praise the Lord!" I think that we sometimes get so worried about breaking the blasphemy rule that we back SO far off as to be stupid. It's actually a bit pathetic if you think about it; akin to taking the counsel to "choose your media carefully" and deciding to not have any music or movies in your home at all

SO, based on what I'm reading in scripture, I've decided that I want to start using God's name more--in appropriate situations of course. Not long ago I was telling a friend about our adventure this summer where our transmission literally imploded while we were on vacation. I told her how the van happened to still be under warranty, and we happened to be in the city with one (of only two) kia dealerships in the state; how we had to spend 3 extra days in Fairbanks, but we weren't out several thousand dollars for repairs, and we got a brand new tranny. I used the phrase "Thank God" rather than "thank goodness" (which was what I would have said before) and you know, it was so appropriate. After all, I think it's God's goodness that all those things 'just happened' so that it worked out ok. We could have broken down in the middle of nowhere. We could have lost the tranny here at home where there is no dealership for 200 miles (and what would a tow cost?! I have no idea!) It was such a blessing that it all happened where it did. And why say thanks to some vague thing like "goodness" when I can actually put the credit where it is due--with God?!

A family friend refers to "God-incidences" rather than "coincidences," and I adopted that phrase sometime ago. I've also always loved the common pagan farewell "Blessed Be." Now I'm just broadening my vocabulary a bit more.