Notes on Waterbirth

Waterbirths are touted as gentler than 'land births' because the baby emerges from a warm liquid to a warm liquid (rather than cold air). Water is also called 'the natural epidural' because it is so effective at relaxing and comforting the laboring woman. I have come to believe that the lubricative properties of the water help mother to stretch rather than tear, adding yet another aspect of gentleness.

"Waterbirth" by Cary York

Waterbirths have been practiced for years by tribes who routinely birthed in streams or lakes or even the ocean, however much of the western world has been scared to try them, fearing that the baby might drown, or, more especially, that it would be very inconvenient for the provider to try to assist a woman in a tub.
Let me begin by clearing up the 'drowning' myth. The baby has spent 9 months completely surrounded by fluid. He gets all his oxygen through the umbilical cord. So long as that cord is intact, he has no need to breathe air or use his lungs. Most midwives do bring the baby right to the surface of the water, but unless the cord has broken (which is rare), they don't really need to. Eagle's head emerged (underwater), and it was at least a full minute before the rest of him came out. During that time his head remained under water but he was fine because his cord did not break until the last moment, and the midwife brought him promptly to the surface and put him in my arms. He did not cough or sputter or anything. He just took a breath of air and stuck out his tongue at me. ☺
I very much hope to have all future babies in water as well. It was that awesome.

So, with that introduction, I thought I would share a few tips about waterbirthing.

THE POOL
First of all, you'll need a pool. Some women birth in their bathtub--this is ok, but tubs are narrow, and all the tub-birthing moms I've talked to have said that it was not very comfortable because it was just too crowded. Some women have a large jetted tub, or a hot tub to birth in. This works well, although the temperature of the hot tub should be lowered to something close to body temperature. It should be comfortably warm, but not hot. (Think about the temperature you use for a baby's bath, and go with that). The third--and most common--option is to rent or buy a birth pool. Some midwives bring the pool with them (and use disposable liners for each woman), some midwives require the mother to purchase her own pool. In my case, I needed to buy a pool.
There are a number of online stores that cater to waterbirth, and sell pools and accessories. There are several companies that manufacture pools specifically designed for birthing--they are large and have high sides. Some even have handles for the mother to hold on to, or a raised seat at one end (see below left). These official birth pools cost anywhere from $125-$450. Alternately, many mothers buy "fishy pools" which are regular inflatable wading pools that are relatively deep (though not quite as deep as the birth pools). The waterbirth stores carry these as well, and they usually cost $25-40. One downside is that pools are heavy, so in my case I picked out a $30 pool but then found that shipping was going to be another $25! A lot of people buy fishy pools from a local store, but that option was not available to me (especially in November!). I mentioned the dilemma to Hubby and he suggested I try amazon and their free shipping. Sure enough, I found the pool on the right for $38 and free shipping (photo is linked to the listing). I actually really liked the star shape, as it provided both flat spaces and 'corners' that I could lean into. It also has a padded floor, which most of the fishy pools do not. I highly recommend it as a birth pool!

One thing to keep in mind--many women want a larger pool so that daddy can get in the pool too, however if you get a pool that holds more than about 100 gallons, you may run out your hot water heater while filling it. So plan ahead and order something that will work with your space, your budget, and your water heater! (My pool held about 90 gallons and fit us both just fine, though it would have been nice to have about 4 more inches of water, Hubby used a pan to pour water over my back during contractions and it was fine.)


ACCESSORIES

• You will need a hose for filling your pool, and an adapter for attaching the hose to your sink faucet or shower head. The adapters cost just a few dollars, but the hose will be a little more. Some women are comfortable using a regular garden hose, but many prefer to buy a medical-grade (lead-free) hose from one of the waterbirth sites.
• It's worth investing in a good size pump for inflating the pool--a manual one is fine (if it's big) or an electric one might be nice if you have an especially big pool. You do not want to try to fill it by mouth!
• I strongly recommend a debris net. It is very common for things besides the baby to be pushed out during birth *ahem* and having a little net to clear them away is very nice. The net only costs a couple of dollars, so if you don't use it it wasn't a huge investment...but if you do need it you'll be glad you had it!
• A draining pump can be attached to the hose to siphon all the water back out of the pool (and down your tub or toilet) after the birth. I did not buy one of these because it was $50 and I had been told that it was easy to set up a manual siphon either into the tub or out the window...however we tried both those things and neither one worked so Hubby ended up having to empty the pool bucket-by-bucket, and got a very sore back in the process. He said next time we need to spring for the pump.

Some sites that offer waterbirthing supplies:
http://waterbirthsolutions.com
http://inhishands.com
http://www.yourwaterbirth.com


TIPS

• Lay a tarp or a plastic shower curtain on the floor under the pool (unless you have it in your kitchen or something). Make sure the plastic extends at least a foot beyond the pool on every side--I left about 6inches and we ended up with damp carpet in several places.
• Do a test run with your pool before your due date. Find out how long it takes to inflate the pool and make sure the space you have planned is large enough.
• After the test run, if you have the space to do so, leave the pool 80% inflated. Then when you are in labor it will be much faster to get it fully inflated and then filled.
• Usually very warm water feels best to the mother, but then there is potential for her to overheat. I did not encounter this myself, but my sister said she really recommends having an electric fan in the room in case mom is getting too hot, so that she doesn't have to get out of the water.
• If mom does get out of the water for a while, lay another shower curtain or tarp over the top of the pool. That will contain the steam so that the water will stay warm. If she is out for a while, the water may cool down and then she won't want to get back in, which more or less defeats the purpose of having the pool in the first place.
• Have a bunch of towels--ideally old ones that you don't mind leaving on the floor or getting dirty. Anytime mom (or anyone else) is in or out of the pool, water will get spread around...it's nice for mom to have a little path of towels to take to the toilet or the bed.
  

Musings on Powerful Birth

I have been thinking for two months now about what made Eagle's birth so different from my last one. I was not at all unhappy with Bear's birth--I did not feel bullied or ignored or disrespected or any of those other things that so many women talk about. On the contrary, I felt empowered. But something about this birth was, well, more empowering.

I tried to narrow down each birth to just a few words, and this was what I came up with:
Bear: relief, out-of-it, disconnected, tiring, fulfilling, empowering
Eagle: intense, personal, hyper-aware, primal, powerful, peaceful, beautiful

Both births were unmedicated. Both births were in the place of my choosing, and with a provider of my choosing who respected my birth plan. I went into each birth well-educated about the process and what to expect and what I would need to do. Each birth was proceeded by mental and emotional (as well as physical) preparation on my part. With both births there was a point where my care provider had to step in and help facilitate the baby's getting out. Both babies were healthy. Both times I had a relatively uncomplicated recovery.

Labor with Bear was 23 hours long--but when it started it started, and over the course of the day it gradually increased in intensity until he was born--just like the books say. Early labor with Eagle occurred in little fits and starts over the course of two weeks (causing me no small mental and emotional exhaustion because I kept thinking this was it...and then it wasn't). When the time came though, I was wakened in the night (by Bear actually), and within minutes was in active labor and Eagle was born a few short hours later. Eagle's labor was more intense--harder in many senses--and yet shorter. Ironically I spent the 'active' part of Bear's labor in bed (because I was tired). While laboring with Eagle I found I could not bear to lay down, I had to be upright and constantly moving. Even while I was pushing Bear out, I was sufficiently exhausted that my contractions were several minutes apart and I was falling asleep between them. While pushing with Eagle everything seemed to move very quickly, and even as he was coming through the birth canal it still seemed a bit surreal that this was finally happening.

Because Bear's coming had been preceded by so many losses, I spent much of my pregnancy connecting to him. I talked to him, sang to him, and during labor thought mostly about finally meeting him. Eagle's pregnancy was such a busy time that I didn't connect to him in the same way...on the other hand, I did get in tune with my body in a way I had not before. During labor I was excited to meet him of course, but I was mostly focused on myself, my body, and what I was doing. It was an entirely different perspective, and for the purposes of labor, I think a more effective one.

During my labor with Bear I was an active participant, but I was following directions. I was too tired and out-of-it to do anything else. While laboring with Eagle I was the leader, doing what felt right when it felt right, without being told to breathe this way or push that way or wait just a minute. I was hyper-aware of every sensation, but I also had the energy and presence to be able to respond to them, so they were more manageable in spite of seeming more intense.

Bear's birth was empowering and triumphant. Eagle's birth was a thing of beauty and peace...and a whole new kind of power.

"Cradle of Love" by NancyBright
used with her permission

Wee-hee!

Baby made a pee...in the toilet!!!
At one day shy of 2 months old.
Today was the second time he stayed dry through a nap, so I took him to the bathroom and held him over the toilet and said "psspsspsspss" and voila, he peed in the toilet. Bear sat and watched and was oh so impressed (in spite of the fact that he was doing the same thing when he was even younger). ☺

I wrote about the little bit of Elimination Communication I did with Bear, and I do believe that it contributed to his learning to use the potty (on his own initiative) around his 2nd birthday.
I definitely believe in cloth diapers, and I don't hesitate to put a diaper on my kid...but especially when I'm at home, I try to pay attention, and if I pick up on patterns (like staying dry for a 2 hour nap and then filling a diaper really full right afterward) then I can use that information to make my baby's life a little more pleasant. Why use/change/wash a diaper if you don't have to, right?

Maybe Eagle will potty train himself at 18 months...shall we take bets on it?! ☺


ETA (edited to add)
We had our second EC catch an hour later (after another little nap). We're off to a good start!

10 10s in 2010

"We are not called to do great things, but small things with great love."
~Mother Theresa

So I'm taking a different approach on goals for the year this year. Last year I opted for simple, because I more or less flopped on my list from 2008. (Well, ok, I did most of it, but not the scrapbooking.)
SO, this year here's something new:
10 goals in each of 10 areas for 2010. (Posted on Jan 10, because I'm a sucker for numbers like that.)
That's not quite as huge as it sounds, because really each area is a goal, and then the 10 within it are sortof the mini-steps. Furthermore there is some overlapping between goals (ie, some of the mini-steps fall into more than one of the bigger goals, so there's not really quite 100 of them). Just keep reading, hopefully it will make sense.
Please note that there is no significance whatsoever to the order in which these are written. (Is that something like when my dad used to draw a map to a place and then write in big letters in the corner "no scale"?!)


1--Keeping My Home

1. Create (and then stick to) a housekeeping system
2. Try out at least one new recipe each month (this is what keeps the doldrums out of my kitchen)
3. Serve balanced meals (with a protein, a vegetable, and a starch/carb) at least most nights
4. Grind my own wheat flour
5. Make bread all year (2 months down and so far so good!!)
6. Build up my food storage--at least 3m worth of all non-perishable items
7. Learn about gardening in Alaska--what foods grow well, when/how to plant and harvest, etc
8. Have a garden
9. Can/freeze produce in season
10. Participate in the butchering and/or preservation of a moose that Hubby shoots (that's one of his goals for the year!

2--Read Books (ideally including the following specific titles)

1. To Kill A Mockingbird
2. A Christmas Carol
3. something by a local author
4. a biography or memoir (I just read Alan Alda's, of all random people...and it was engrossing!)
5. *Going Rogue by Sarah Palin (mostly for cultural literacy)
6. Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel (Time top 10)
7. Logicomix by Apostolos Doxiadis et al (about Bertrand Russell) (Time top 10)
8. Beauty by Robin McKinley
9. Changing My Mind by Zadie Smith (Time top 10)
10. Icy Sparks
11. (alternate) Fablehaven

3--Improve Financial Stability

1. Pay off (at least) one account
2. Keep current with tithing (unfortunately some months this has been hard for us, and then catching up on our tight budget is even harder)
3. Live within our means, always considering wants vs needs, and making the modest choice even with the latter.
4. Use coupons and shop sales at the grocery store
5. Use our tax returns and PFD's wisely (for food storage/debt, not playing!)
6. Build up our food storage
7. Build up my year's supply (the non food stuff, like toilet paper and toothpaste and laundry soap) to 3-6months worth
8. Do not buy any new diaper/etc fabric
9. Sew items to sell using the fabric I have
10. Actively market my etsy shops

4--Be More Present with my Family

1. Read more books to my kids (I've been doing better with this through this last fall, and hope to continue it)
2. Acquire a couple of new children's books in order to do #1 without losing my mind ☺
3. Cuddle my kids every day
4. Include the kids in the housekeeping schedule (give them assignments)
5. Stay OFF the internet one day a week (generally Tuesday)
6. Be a good example for the kids by limiting my screen time on other days (haven't settled the specifics of that)
7. Say "just a minute" less often
8. Play with my kids, not just work near them
9. Have a monthly 'date' with each family member
10. Go to bed at the same time as my Hubby (so we can have pillow talk and cuddle time)

5--Create

1. Create (sew or knit) at least 6 things per month, for my family or my shop
2. Introduce a new product (or two or three) in my shop(s) this year.
3. Allow myself the thought-outlet of blogging frequently ☺
4. Finish Wolf's sweater
5. Knit something for myself (I have no idea what yet)
6. Use up existing stash rather than buying new materials
7. Try out at least one new recipe each month
8. Learn how to make shampoo/conditioner (ideally by doing so...it depends on how hard it is to come by ingredients)
9. Make handmade gifts for my family/friends (not necessarily to the exclusion of purchased items)
10. Help my children make things

6--Focus Inward

1. Be more active (I'd like to go walking, though in winter in Alaska with two little ones and no where to walk indoors this is a challenge...)
2. Work on my poor ignored abdominals...crunches or pilates or something
3. Get outside more often
4. Read more fiction (see list above!)
5. Read my scriptures
6. Pray more (an ongoing challenge for me unfortunately)
7. Get the local breastfeeding support group on it's feet. (There isn't one, so I took it upon myself to make one. The social support helps me so much and I believe in the cause)
8. Sing more
9. Take time to be still and quiet
10. Check in on these goals at least quarterly to monitor my progress (I'll post those here on the blog)

7--Focus Outward

1. Do my visiting teaching every month
2. Become a Big Sister with Big Brothers/Big Sisters...it's something I've wanted to do for a long time, I just am not sure how it will go with a newborn...
3. Build up the local breastfeeding support group.
4. Fulfill my church calling (I am the coordinator over the Relief Society meetings formerly referred to as "Home, Family, and Personal Enrichment meetings")
5. "Pay It Forward" whenever I can (in whatever ways I can)
6. Look specifically for opportunities to PIF/send out good karma
7. Shop locally or handmade whenever possible.
8. Feed the local missionaries each month
9. Teach a friend how to do something new (a lady at church has asked about learning to make a babywearing pouch and another has asked about cloth diapers)
10. Teach my kids how to do new things (Wolf has expressed interest in knitting and trying the sewing machine, Bear is learning to put away the silverware from the dishwasher)

8--Learn

1. Read a parenting book
2. Read a marriage/relationship book
3. Read a political book
4. Read a nutrition or health book
5. Read a biography or teachings of a latter day prophet or apostle
6. Read my scriptures
7. Learn new knitting techniques (starting with increases from opposite sides)
8. Learn how to make shampoo and/or conditioner
9. Try out at least one new recipe each month
10. Seek to find/recognize the sacred in all aspects of life, and the connections between truths ("spiritual" and otherwise)

9--Blog

1. Write a series of posts about The Family proclamation
2. Finish the final post in my "motherhood" series
3. Finish the birth-related posts that are sitting in my drafts folder
4. Research and write more posts on specific vaccinations
5. Write reviews of the books I have read but haven't written about yet: Hold On To Your Kids, The Omnivore's Dilemma, Raising Your Spirited Child
6. Write reviews of books I read this year
7. Post more regularly on my cooking blog
8. Post more regularly on my family scrapbook blog (it's private, for keeping extended family updated mostly)
9. Fill in gaps by posting older stuff on the family scrapbook blog too
10. Leave comments on my friends' blogs ☺

10--Celebrate

1. Celebrate the earth cycle holidays (equinoxes, solstices). I have some ideas about what I want to do, but would love to hear ideas.
2. Finally start our long-planned family tradition of having an authentic medieval meal (ie, big meat, candlelight, no utensils) once a year. I can't decide between Michaelmas and Spring Equinox--thoughts?
3. Establish a new family tradition for Jesus' Birthday (April 6--I'll write about it when we get there)
4. Have a family pizza night at least twice a month (we are currently doing about 3x), and invite someone to join us.
5. Have a family or couples game night at least once a month
6. Go to playgroup and mom's support (breastfeeding) group and RS meetings and thus rejuvenate myself often
7. Visit some major sites of my own state (this will be our third summer since moving here, but we've never really traveled IN state!) We're looking at Denali NP and Fairbanks at least.
8. Play music in the home/car, and sing more
9. Get outside often and breathe deeply
10. Do my best to live deeply and suck the marrow out of life

Spelling Stories

Each week Wolf has a list of spelling words. As part of his homework he's supposed to either write a sentence for each word, or a story using all the words. He usually opts for the sentences, because trying to make a coherent story out of a list of random words is daunting, but a couple of times I've looked at his list of words and seen story just begging to get out, so I've helped him make a story with them. They are awfully cute and I thought they should be preserved. (When I told him I'd like to copy the stories to share he got quite excited.) ☺
Keeping in mind that these are written for/by a 9 year old boy, enjoy!
(spelling words are italicized)




Orion and I went on a trip by ourselves. You have to understand our background. Orion always gets homesick whenever we go to an airport, so I thought this time we could go by railroad. I was just putting on my seatbelt when Orion barfed everywhere. I had never seen anything like it. He barfed everything he had eaten since breakfast. Meanwhile I already knew we would go home by afternoon. That night as we sat by my fireplace, we talked about the ninety-nine places we want to go Maybe next time we will go on motorcycles and then Orion will be all right. It's a good thing our trips are all make-believe, otherwise I might not go with him again; that barf was really bad!

The End

(The teacher wrote back that this was "the best spelling word story [he] had ever read!")

Don't you think they should make electric jackets? It would work like an electric blanket.

I made the mistake of bringing up this peculiar topic with my friend Fred. Fred didn't hear me, he was too busy telling me about his tropical trip. He told me an aquatic story that made me sick to my stomach.

He was at a public beach with his pet squirrel when he decided to go surfing. He went to his dad's truck to get a surfboard but the only one left was crooked. He decided to go anyway. He went out on the water but the wobbly board made his back ache so he decided to lay down on the board and look at fish.. He saw a beautiful speckled one swim next to him and then sink again. He didn't stop to question why, he struck out after it. Unfortunately something else had decided to track that fish too. Fred saw the shark just in time to avoid attack. the shark bit the speckled fish in half and Fred swam away very fast.

I'll stay home with my electric jacket thank you!

The End

Friday Feel Up

Get your new year off on the right foot, er, breast--do your self exam!

Life With Children

Bear: Hey Mommy! Don't take my picture, just get Eagle

Mom: Okay

Eagle: He's still touching me!!!

Mom: Honey can you move ove...

Bear: HI!!!!!

Mom: [moves the baby to another room]

Eagle: [smiles]

[audience sighs...]

And if you're dying to see pictures of Bear at the same age (so you can compare and then argue about whether they look the same or not...) here's Bear at 5 weeks. (Unfortunately I don't have anything digital of Wolf that young...)

2009 in Review

A couple of my friends have done this sort of thing, and I find it fascinating.
Take the first most interesting sentence of each post, find the best one (or few) from each month, and post them together as a synopsis of my year. ☺(For your browsing ease, I have linked each post...enjoy!)

January
At one point, my sweet innocent son explained to someone "this is the plain eggnog, and that one is for alcoholics."

Square miles on Chichagof: about 2000
People on Chichagof: 1100
Freakin Huge Bears on Chichagof: 1600
Now see, don't you feel educated?!

Well, the little-Bear-who-is-not-so-little has just come and stuck yet another body part into my face so that I can kiss it better.

The other night Hubby and I were talking, and the subject turned to a particular relative of ours whom I'll call Marge (because that is not her name). ☺

He looked at me very seriously. "No peepee door," he agreed, pointing.

February
I know I’m supposed to leave comments about how cute the kids are…but sometimes I just can’t, because some kids are not cute.

I can make his favorite dinner and wear his favorite color and get the kids to bed early, but unless I actually say "hey baby, I'm feelin frisky tonight" then I can't take it personally if he settles in with his book.

I am 27 23.

Wolf spent most of his time climbing the piles of snow at the edges of the field (where the plows pile it up) and then 'skydiving' off them onto the field.
Bear mostly wandered around picking up chunks of snow and sucking on them.

When a 2 year old has an 8 year old brother, he gets a head start on learning about stuff like super powers and bazookas.

March
I'm going to read the entire book. (And if I one day suddenly stop blogging, you may assume that I died from the experience.)

Hubby made the excellent point that if someone is too dumb to be able to read the directions and understand that one line means no and two lines means yes, well, they’ve got no business having kids.

I feel lousy this afternoon. And a little bit nauseous.
Yay!!!

April
I just don't like the idea of public nudity, even when I'm dead.

May
This is my life, how could I be content with mediocrity?

June
As a child, I had a lovely mental picture of Heavenly Father. He was huge, and He sat on a big white throne nestled in puffy clouds. There were birds and flowers and angels and books all around him.

July
Long ago, before much of anyone bothered with things like bathing or changing their clothing, everybody stank a bit.

All you lower 48-ers, eat your hearts out. ☺

I was awakened by him standing over the edge of my bed, peering into my face at close range. "Mommy," he explained, "you have a nuggert, I'm gonna get it for you," and without further ado he stuck his finger into my nose

August
Unfortunately, this has led to the not-infrequent recurrence of what happened today: we collect a large pile of stuff that needs to be packed, and then Hubby turns serenely to me and says "you can get that all in, right?" and goes on his way...

The short version of it all is that I believe (and have heard quite a few birth stories which vindicate the belief) that most women get the labor they expect. It may not be the labor they planned for, it may not be the labor they wanted, but at least to some degree it was probably the one that they expected.

September
Remember diapers are to catch poop, not to win beauty contests; it's ok if they look a little funny.

The real irony is, if either one of us was going to be a handcuff-myself-to-a-tree sort of activist, it probably would have been me.

October
I am only one, but I AM one.
I cannot do everything, but I CAN do SOMEthing.
And if I am too lazy or selfish to do the things that I can do, well, shame on me. And if I take some small pride in doing the small things I can do, well, I think that's probably healthy.

Imagine the impact we might have on our culture's concept of birth if little children of both sexes grew up comfortable with birthing! Imagine if not only the future mothers, but also the future fathers, and the future doctors, midwives, and nurses all had witnessed a birth (or several) prior to adulthood

November
In other words, for many women, giving birth is the one time in her life when she is being true to what she is--when she is actually doing something as nature intended--and that can be a powerful (and empowering) experience. It is her chance to be a WOMAN rather than another androgynous clone.

Don't expect to have time to grab stuff if your house catches on fire, you will probably have to just run as you are (so don't sleep in your underwear!!).

I'm tired, I'm sore, I'm cranky, and it's entirely possible that I'm losing my mental acuity at least a little bit (remember how I keep waking up confused at still being pregnant? Yeah, that...)

December
I'm not saying that great gifts cannot be purchased items, just that the greatness of a gift is not correlated to its cost.

Whoops

I just scheduled (or tried to schedule) a post, and then it posted instead of scheduling...whoops, forgot to set the date. So I pulled it, and I'll post it in a week or so (which is when I actually want it to post). ☺

"Birth is not merely a means to an end..."

"Birth is not merely a means to an end,
it is an event that changes a family and is imprinted on a woman's life forever.
♥
The memories of their children's births are among the most vivid memories a woman will ever have.
♥
Get any group of women together and ask them about their birth experiences, and you will hear of joy, pain, sorrow, triumph, and a myriad of other strong and powerful emotions."


~Andrea Lythgoe, doula and childbirth educator
(from her website, posted with her permission)