My favorite babywearing pictures

So, over at Adventures in Babywearing she's holding a contest...enter your favorite babywearing photo, win a sling (a really fancy groovy sling) from Nonny & Boo.
I have three slings of my own actually, and I don't need another, but I thought it would be fun to play along (and I know of a great place where I could donate it if I win).
Without further ado, my favorite babywearing photos (clicking on the photo will take you to the post where I originally posted it)

wear baby, go cool places!
(try to use stroller, get stuck in mud on steep, narrow trail and never make it up to beautiful Payto Lake in Banff National Park!)

We were kangaroos for his first halloween!
(now I'm trying to think of other pouch animals for future costumes--leave me your suggestions if you've got any!)

Thanksgiving Challenge

I mentioned before how I had planned to try to post one thing I'm thankful for each day this month, but thanks to being depressed (and a little to forgetting my own idea until several days into the month) I didn't do it.

Well, I've had another idea--on Thanksgiving I'll be posting a massive list of things I'm thankful for. Right now I have my sights set on the lofty goal of 365 things--one for each day of the year. I haven't started writing the list yet though... I may end up settling with 100 things if I get too overwhelmed....
Anyway, I wanted to issue an official challenge to all my readers to work on lists of their own, so that when I post my list we can all link them together and revel in the gratitude. ☺

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I would LOVE to see this get big! On Thanksgiving morning (or the night before) when I post my post, I will include a Mr Linky on it, so that anyone and everyone who joins me can share their links there. So tell your friends, spread the love, and Be Grateful!!

BTW, I will be posting my list in sections--Family, Skills, Home, Faith, Technology, etc so that it's more reader-friendly (it's gonna be a loooong list!)...just a thought for anyone who plans to join me!

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If you would like the button, the script is there in the sidebar! (Thanks a million to this site for teaching me how to make a scriptbox for my button!!!)

Myths About Babywearing

International Babywearing week is coming up, and I thought I'd take a few minutes this morning to write about some prevalent misconceptions concerning babywearing...

(little Bear, age 14months, tucked in and toasty, and ready for the morning walk with the dog)

The baby will be delayed in walking if you never put them down or Baby's spine development will be damaged by being 'unsupported' in a soft carrier or Baby will get bowlegs from having them spread out in a back-carry
Your baby will still learn to walk just fine, no he will not be delayed in doing so (I wore Bear almost constantly, and he walked at 11months). In addition, being against the caregivers body and feeling their motions as they walk and move often seems to help little ones learn that motion for themselves.
Some firm carriers (such as snuglis) have been reported to damage spinal development because they hold the baby up and do not allow him to learn to support himself, however softer carriers do not have this problem!
The bowleggedness seen in some traditional cultures is the product of nutritional deficiencies, not of being worn. Remember that babies and small children have much softer tissues than adults do, and are much more flexible.

The baby isn't comfortable "all squished up like that" or "with his legs sticking out that way"
Soft tissues = flexible = baby is comfortable almost any way so long as they are supported! It's pretty rare to meet a baby who doesn't love being snuggled and, yes, even squished a bit. The soft nature of fabric carriers means that the baby is more likely to be comfortable this way than in a carseat, crib, playpen, or roomier firm carrier.

The baby will be spoiled /never let you put him down /never learn to go to sleep on his own
I think these myths are based in the false premise that babies are meant to be independent creatures. They are not. As I discussed here, from an evolutionary standpoint humans are born only about halfway through the average mammals gestational development. In other words, until they are around 9months old, they are not even able to do what a 9 minute old baby of other species can do. A continued 'external gestation' is entirely healthy and appropriate.
In terms of the baby developing 'bad' habits, well, obviously I feel that it's acceptable and appropriate for a baby to want to be held all the time, and to go to sleep with a caregiver rather than alone. In terms of shyness, and the baby becoming a "mama's boy," studies indicate that children who are worn may take a little longer to strike out on their own, but when they do so they are more confident than babies who were forced into independence at earlier ages.

Babywearing is dangerous
There are several versions of this this myth--the baby is unsupported and will slip out the bottom of the carrier, the baby will flip out the top of the carrier, or that the baby will suffocate being all smooshed in there. The truth is that these are valid concerns, and all of them can happen if you are not paying attention. Just because you are wearing your baby doesn't mean you can ignore them--you do need to still pay attention, make sure baby's face is clear so they can breathe, and be sure you wear the carrier properly so that the child is secure. Here is a site full of help for how to properly and safely wear your child.

You can only wear them when they are little/lightweight or You can't wear a baby if you have a bad back
There are a few people in the world who have exceptionally bad backs, and yes, it's true that they cannot wear a baby, or at least not a older toddler. However, with the variety of carriers and carrying methods, most people (even those with somewhat-bad backs) are able to wear both babies and toddlers in comfort.
Back carries with wraps, structured-carriers, or ABCs (such as Mei Teis) are usually preferable for larger children or weak-backed parents because they offer more support and spread the weight around better.

You can't babywear if you're short/disabled/plus-sized/pregnant
Nonsense! Some carriers and carrying positions may work better for you than others, but you can certainly still wear your baby! Check out these two articles on plus-sized babywearing, this one on pregnant babywearing, and this one on babywearing for those with disabilities.

Babywearing is new or a fad
Babywearing has been around for about as long as babies have been around...indigenous peoples around the world have been wearing their babies for centuries, and using a variety of carriers and carrying positions to do so. The 'modern world' is the culture that is behind the times!

Babywearing is expensive
$140 for a wrap?! Yes, it can be expensive if you buy the name brand carriers, or have a dozen different ones (and yes, a lot of us do have several carriers of different types)...but it doesn't have to be. I got a good quality wrap for only $35, and many people find that they can make their own carriers for $5-20 (depending on the style and what fabric they choose). Here is a site with a list of different types of carriers, the pros/cons of each, and where to find them.

Babywearing is complicated
It is true that some styles of carriers (most notably wraps) look difficult to tie on. However there are a lot of great online demos (both pictures and videos) that can help you learn to do it correctly and safely.
If you are considering babywearing, or want to do it but don't know where to go next, I recommend looking for a local babywearing group such as NINO. (If you can't find one, look for a local chapter of LaLecheLeague, as a lot of breastfeeding moms also wear their babies, and you can probably find support or advice for babywearing there too!)

You can't wear twins
Wanna bet? Look here! And here!

For additional resources, I highly recommend visiting The Baby Wearer. It's a massive archive of helpful articles and tutorials on topics from choosing a carrier and reviews of specific brands, to how to correctly (safely) wear your baby in the various carriers, or how to make your own. They also have forums where you can chat with other babywearers and get encouragement and help.

some thoughts after the fact

I have a lot of friends who shared their presidential preferences with me prior to the election. Apparently I'm the friend of rebels, because my McCain-voting friends all live in states that swung for Obama, and my Obama-voting friends all live in states that swung for McCain. Except for Indiana, which was split almost down the center (I actually don't know which way it ended up) but anyway I know people who voted both ways there, so the original statement still holds. I hang out with rebels people who do their own thinking rather than following the crowd. ☺

The night before election day I was talking with my dad about the candidates and issues, and suffice it to say that my priorities are not the same as his. He commented that when he was my age he was more liberal than he is now, but that with age he has become "more jaded and cynical" (his words, not mine). Then he said "you know, I would expect a young person to be idealistic and hopeful--if they weren't then I'd be worried."
I thought that was a very interesting commentary on politics.

Pie Night!

I grew up in a family where we had birthday pies more often than birthday cakes...after all, pie is a whole lot better than cake, don't you think?!
When we were engaged, Hubby and I were invited to his neighbor's home for pie night. We know a good idea when we see one, so we latched on to the idea and have held annual pie nights of our own ever since. The 5th Annual Brighton Family Pie Night was last night.

I took "Chocolate Barbarian Pie" and a savory pie,
and yup, I've posted both of the recipes for you on the recipe blog...
I'm going to be posting pies there all month, so check back in!!

So, what is Pie Night you may ask? Good question! Go ahead and take notes now, because as soon as you finish reading this you're probably going to run off and start a pie night tradition of your own.
1--everybody brings a pie (and server). (As hosts, we provide plates, forks, and whipped cream along with a pie or two.)
2--there are many many kinds of pie
3--everybody pigs out on lots and lots and lots of pie!

The first year we did it it was a small affair, with only 5 pies (two made by me). The next year it grew, and our third year had 36 people crammed in our little house. Then we moved to Pelican, and had to start over...however this is a friendly little town, and we had over a dozen attendees last year...now that the locals have had enough time to get to know us, this year was a little bigger. Last night we had 22 people and 17 pies! (It was the year of pumpkin pie--there were 6 pumpkin pies!) I think this years winner as fanciest pie was DS's Pear-Almond Creme Tart with Cranberry Flakes... although I personally also really love the Upside-down Pumpkin Pie that CS makes (she said she hates making crust, so she makes the pumpkin pie filling, then puts it in a casserole dish and does a nut-crumb topping on it!)


A couple of little notes if you want to host a Pie Night of your own:

• Put out a couple of pitchers of ice water! With all the rich pie, people tend to need a drink!
• Be sure to remind people to bring a server with their pie, otherwise you might have 8 pies and 1 server...that's awkward!
• Use index cards or something to put labels in front of each pie, so that people can tell what each one is when they go to choose their slices...for example, last night we had a plain chocolate and a chocolate-mocha which looked almost identical, but some people like mocha and some don't, so it's good to have labels!

SBE when Lactating

It's the first Friday of the month, that time when I remind everybody to do a Self Breast Exam. Feel 'em up folks!
For what it's worth, men can get breast cancer too, so hey, go for it guys, poke around a bit, ok?
☺
OK, so like I mentioned before, with each months reminder I'm trying to add some additional health info. This month (at the request of a commenter) I'm taking on doing SBEs when lactating. Obviously lactation (while reducing the likelihood of future breast cancer) leaves the breasts full of milk, which makes it harder to feel lumps.
The short and simple answer can be found at Breastfeeding123, which recommends doing the self-exams immediately after nursing, so that the breast will be as un-full as possible.
MamaKnowsBreast (Oct 4 entry) agrees that it's good to continue to do self exams when breastfeeding, although there is a good chance that you'll notice tissue changes which are not cancerous. Everyday Health comments that if you have not previously been doing SBEs, then pregnancy or lactating may not be great times to start because your breasts are going through so many changes. On the other hand, if you already have the habit, then it's a good thing to continue.
My own thought is that SBEs could be helpful with those non-cancerous changes too though--for example if you are familiar with the 'normal' feel of your breasts, then if you get a plugged duct you'll be able to quickly recognize the abnormality and address the issue... For the same reason, I think it makes sense for lactating women to do at least 'quick once-over' type exams in the shower on a more frequent basis.
This article is packed with information about breast health during pregnancy and lactation. (Incidentally, you should never have a mammogram while lactating.)

Here are directions for doing a SBE when you are lactating.

stuff lately (with an update)

One of my friends recently posted that she's been having issues with comments not getting through, and that she resolved it by switching the format of her comment form...I have noticed the same lack of comments too (I participated in two blog carnivals this week and didn't get a single comment on them...) so I made the switch too and it seems to help! So sorry if you've tried to comment lately and it hasn't gone through, but we should be good now!!

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On a personal note, I've been having a rough time lately. I've had problems with varying degrees of seasonal depression for as long as I can remember, and then when I started having miscarriages the grief brought on long-term (non-seasonal) depression. Each new pregnancy brought me out of it, each miscarriage dropped me back in, and each dip seemed deeper than the last. In the first trimester of my pregnancy with Bear, (which was even in summer) I was suffering from some of the deepest depression of my life. Hubby and I would sit down each night and he literally had to help me think of one thing from the day to be happy about--I had the whole world to be happy about and I couldn't find any of it.
Thankfully, in the latter part of my pregnancy things turned up. In spite of a January delivery date, I had neither seasonal nor post-partum depression. Last year when we moved to Alaska (with the long dark nights in winter) I was worried about SAD, but again, I had no problems at all. I thought that perhaps that period of my life was over and that I was finally free of depression... but alas, that is not the case. In the last month or so I have been sinking again. (The timing of it--coinciding with my recently returned fertility--makes me wonder if it's hormonally linked.) I feel down in spite of all my efforts to keep busy, be productive, and do things I enjoy. No amount of successes seems to make up for the days I neglect to make a decent dinner or the nights my son gets mad at me. I am insanely jealous of my friends and family who are pregnant. I am lonely. I go to my weekly knitting circle, sew things for my etsy shops, knit, and chat online with my friends...they all seem to help in the moment, but nothing lasts. At the end of the day I again am having to sit down with my husband and have him help me think of something to be glad about. I wanted to spend the month of November sharing lists of things I'm thankful for, but the truth is that I have been having a hard time finding anything to be happy about. I know there are things, and when someone points them out to me I do recognize them...but I struggle a great deal to think of them on my own.
In short, I am depressed right now. I cling to your comments more than you know--it's a much-needed reminder that someone out there cares. If I seem a little obsessive--posting daily (or more), checking my email 4 times a day, and crying on days when I didn't have lunch ready on time for my family...well, please just realize that this is me not coping very well. I know all the stuff I am supposed to do; it's just really hard to care enough about anything to do it.


I guess I go into all this for the same reason that I talk about my miscarriages: just to say hey, there are a lot of people out there dealing with this. It may not show on the outside--it may not even show to those who are right around us--but that doesn't make it any less real, or any less important.

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11:22pm
So I come out and tell everybody how I'm depressed, and within hours I have 10 comments. Maybe I should be depressed more often!!
Thank you all so much. I realized today, after writing about how much I crave comments and feedback, that you probably could already tell that about me...after all, the title I put on my followers is "people who love me" and I changed my comment form to "__ people love me enough to comment." It all makes me sound a bit needy, doesn't it?! But you have lifted my spirits (for now at least), and I thank you.
I ended up having quite a nice night at knitting circle tonight (I got to the armpits of my sweater, so now it is starting to look like a sweater instead of just a tube!!), and I had a remarkably good hair day in spite of neglecting to braid it last night, and I made yogurt tonight which always makes me happy...and tomorrow is Pie Night (if you don't know what that is, well, you'll hear about it this weekend, I promise!) Things are feeling much more up at the moment. That may or may not mean anything for tomorrow, but hey, I'll take all the good moments I can get. ☺
To those of you who responded to my comment about hormones...the more I think about it, the more I realize that I think my depression is related directly to my menstrual cycles. I have had my hormone levels tested before (when I was going through the recurrent miscarriage testing), and from out here I don't have a way to have them re-tested...however I'm going to read up on some things and may look into supplementing. I think it's very likely that my depression set in at menarche, was gone during the amenorrhea of breastfeeding, and now has returned with my fertility...

WFMW--Boynton Books

This week is a special themed Works For Me Wednesday at Rocks in my Dryer, focused on toys worth buying...


One of my favorite children's authors of all time is Sandra Boynton. She is a master of writing books that little ones love and adults can enjoy even on the 427th reading. Her inventive stories, clever wording, fun rhythm and cute pictures make these books ones that we won't tire of.

Here are some of our favorites


Barnyard Dance If you hadn't heard of this book, well, what rock were you living under?! Seriously, this book is such a classic! It's written in a rhythm that makes you want to get up and dance with all the crazy little animals... (She recently finished Barnyard Bath, I so need to get that one now!)








This was one of my favorites when I read it to my little siblings, so I bought it for Wolf, and now it is Bear's favorite. Blue Hat Green Hat is the first book that he's obviously loved, and he loves to read it back to me as well "boo ha, gee ha, OOOP!"






We recently discovered Snuggle Puppy at our local library. It's another darling book, with a mommy doggie singing to her little snuggle puppy "ooo snuggle puppy of mine, everything about you is especially fine...Fuzzy little snuggle puppy I love you *kiss*" How could we not enjoy a book that has kissing your kiddo written right into it?!






If you'd like something for a slightly older audience (this one is not a board book) I have to recommend Consider Love. I got this for Hubby on valentines day one year, and we all enjoy reading it still. (If you go to the amazon page I linked you should be able to see some of the pages.)




Next on my list to buy:

Talking Bear

So, you know how kids say words in the cutest ways? I decided to document some this week...

moo-nee = smoothie (one of his favorite things! I make them like this)
Nurn, na-nu, or wan-too = nursing
shooshoo = shoes and socks
duck = stuck (or come help me!)
bankee = blanket/blankee (he loves to snuggle with the bankee and the nanu at bedtime or naptime...lately he insists that he needs all three of his bankees.)
omo = remote control (he knows he's not supposed to play with them, so if we have them out for use, he usually brings them to us with a concerned "omo! omo!" His favorite place to put them is on dad's shoulders...dad did that once to keep the remotes out of the way because Bear was on his lap...and now Bear has concluded that that is the only correct place for them.)
bum-bum = diaper
piss-EEN = this is his word for his little boy part...yes we told him the correct word...no we don't know how he ended up with this
coo-mee = excuse me (he says this when he wants to get past someone, or when anyone in the room burps or *foofs)
dop-it = stop it
wet-go = let go (he says this at night when I'm trying to get him to stay in bed and he wants to go play)

and a few things he pronounces impeccably, even if his meaning is unusual...

iss hot = it's hot (this is his only word for temperature...he says it about everything from shower water to cold wind.)
HAT! = I am putting on my hat because I want to go outside!!
go!-go!-go!-go!-go! = let's go run back and forth down the hall or go outside or something
bunny - 'skin the bunny' (we say this to him when we're taking off his shirt--he already knew to hold his arms up for this, but now he will come to me, plucking at his shirt, and asking "bunny?")
boat
bird (also duck, although he doesn't know which birds are ducks unless i tell him_
no
yes (although he rarely says it--usually he just repeats the word of what he wants if he wants it, or says no if he doesn't)


To see more cute stuff that kids say, check out Tiny Talk Tuesday, celebrating our kids, the things they say, and their view of the world.

*foof is the family word for flatulance

Ralph Nader: A Reasonable Choice

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man. ~~George Bernard Shaw "Man and Superman" 1903

Maybe you've heard of it (and maybe you haven't) but there's a movie called "Ralph Nader: An Unreasonable Man" which is, oddly enough, about Ralph Nader. If you have Netflix, it's available to watch instantly. I strongly recommend it.
Now go ahead and make fun of him for just a second for being named Ralph...now remind yourself that it's not his fault. Besides which, it's not any worse than being named George, and that's served a bunch of presidents just fine.
Are you done giggling now?
Now?
OK. Good.

Here are some facts about a candidate that I finally feel comfortable standing behind:
(this is mostly quoted and/or paraphrased from his biographical information on his own site)
♦He was named by Time Magazine as one of the 100 Most Influential Americans in the twentieth century.
♦He graduated from Princeton magna cum laude. He has studied Chinese and Russian, and received his LLB 'with distinction' from Harvard Law (in other words, he's smart).
♦After serving with the army, he traveled through Latin America, Africa, and Europe. He has interviewed world leaders as a freelance journalist, and seen firsthand the world and the great social struggles within it.

♦Nader is authentic and frank (Find the episode of SNL he appeared on--he's a terrible actor). In spite of efforts to find them, no one has ever been able to find a scandal around him.

♦Nader has been an advocate for the consumer since the age of 31 when he wrote an article "The Safe Car You Can't Buy," which pointed out safety defects in US cars and criticized the auto industry for them. (Incidentally, the auto industry went to great lengths to try to quiet or discredit him, but they were unable to find any blots on his character.) His research and subsequent lobbying helped push congress to pass the 1966 National Traffic and Motor Vehicle Safety Act (which included things like requiring seatbelts in all vehicles). In the process, he also won a settlement ($425,000 for invasion of his privacy as they tried to bring him down), and so he found himself financially set for life...but did he retire? No! Instead he has put that money toward making this country a better and safer place for consumers. He feels it is an ethical imperative to take on these issues, and that the federal government is now one of them. "Our 'democracy' is a fraud--it's consumer fraud" ~Pat Buchanan

Here are some more things Nader has lobbied for, created, or otherwise helped establish:

• Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA)
• Environmental Protection Agency (EPA)
• Clean Air Act
• Consumer Product Safety Commission
• Safe Drinking Water Act
• Freedom of Information Act
• Center for Science in the Public Interest
• Wholesome Meat Act (requiring inspections at slaughterhouses and packing plants)
• Foundation for Taxpayers and Consumer Rights
• warning labels on medications
• and literally dozens more...

He believes that corporations have too much power in and over the government, and strives to make our government 'by the people, for the people, and of the people.' He believes in using the legal system to right injustices, and to strengthen democracy. Even if you have no desire to vote for him, you should understand that his efforts have a daily effect on you. If you ever wear a seatbelt, breathe clean air, eat safe food, get a refund when you're bumped from a flight, or a dozen other things...Nader was behind it.

A few words from Ralph:

"If you get things out in the open, you'll get some action."

"The democrats and republicans are essentially one corporate entity with two heads."

And since I always say it should be about issues, not just the character and accomplishments of the candidate, here are his positions:

• Shift power back to the people and away from the corporate monopolies in radio, television, telephone, gas, and electric, and utility companies.
• Improve workers rights, including a living wage ($10/hr), the right to unionize, and seating judges who will side with wronged employees over corporations. (Down with Walmart!)
• Stop the bailout, and instead focus on jailing the crooked people involved.
  
• His energy policy includes tax incentives for those who comply as well as tax penalties for those who do not. Some points are: more efficient factories, promote renewable energy development, improve transportation options, and preserve regulatory protections. (He favors solar power first as it is safer the nuclear.)
• In education, he favors cutting out high-stakes testing and increasing funding. He is pro-vouchers.
  
• Nader favors a "National Initiative" which would move us more toward a true democracy--where petitions could be turned into national ballot measures, and the people could vote for what they want, instead of standing by while congress sits in the laps of corporations and ignores the people.
• Single Payer Healthcare (my Hubby wrote about this recently too if you didn't go read it yet).
• In the middle east: pull out of Iraq quickly, and work with existing peaceful groups to stabilize the area.
• Be hard on corporate crime.
• Civil liberties, including pulling back on the Patriot Act and racial profiling, equal pay for women, gay-rights, racial-equality, rights and support for those with disabilities, and legalizing medical marijuana (it's safer than a lot of the stuff the FDA has approved) and industrial hemp.
• In agriculture, increase food safety, promote and protect the small farms, organic foods, and sustainable practices. He supports genetically modified foods.

Yes, I disagree with him on some things...I oppose same-sex marriage (although I favor equal rights--just not special rights). I oppose genetically modified foods (although I at least trust Nader to put safety ahead of profit, which is my main objection to GM foods). Ralph Nader is not perfect, BUT I find him unerringly honest, and while I disagree with him on some specifics, I do trust that he will always be genuine and do what he feels is right, even if it's unpopular. Furthermore, I heartily believe in voting third party in the interest of breaking up the duopoly which currently exists in US politics.

Again and again, Ralph Nader is an advocate for the little guy, and seeks to make the bigwigs be accountable. Honestly, it reminds me of the continental congress the summer that they sent George III the Declaration of Independence, and so I leave you with a quote from that same...
"Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security."

With the lesser of two evils, you still end up with evil.

Vote for someone you actually like.

If you don't vote your conscience now, when will you start?