I wrote yesterday about releasing judgmentalism with others, particularly with our children. Today is a harder part: releasing it from ourselves.
There are two sides to this releasing: the first is to release the judgments that others put upon us (today), and the other is to release the ones we put upon ourselves (which I'll get to tomorrow).
Other people judge us all the time. They tell us that we're too fat or too thin. Too pious or too lax. Too conservative or too liberal. Overthinking or under-researching. Too uptight or too lazy. It's never possible to please everyone, and it's not worth trying to do so. The Apostle Paul taught that it was important to please God, and that trying to please our fellow men was counterproductive to that goal. So it's not just possible, it's actually important to "be like a duck" as they say, and just "let it roll off your back."
A friend of mine recently shared a story with me which I hope she won't mind my sharing with you. She and her husband have made some choices that have led them to move in a different spiritual direction from the rest of their family. One sister in particular was deeply concerned about their new path and spoke to them at length, assuring them that their choice was going to bring them condemnation. My friend's husband explained (again) that they felt like this was the right thing for them to do, and then told her that he released her judgments. In other words, she could feel or say what she liked, and he would even listen, but he would not absorb the anger, or the judgment.
There will always be someone out there to tell us that we are wrong or bad in some way, but we can release their judgments. The only Judge who matters is God, and so long as we keep ourselves square with Him, we will be fine.
I really enjoyed your post. I am not even sure how I stumbled upon you as I am in Utah, but I do enjoy reading your blog. My husband and I are starting on a new awareness path with our faith as well. Our parents are quite upset and have told us that we are 'ruining' our children. It is tough. But we are learning not to judge them and not to absorb their anger. Funny how much more loving we are becoming as we see them acting out but doing so "righteously". As more time goes by they are accepting us without so much judgement and we are talking openly about things more. Some of our neighbors are still trying to guilt us back 'into the fold' but I try to remind them that Jesus doesn't use guilt as a tool.
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